Valentines Fun

by Tawny

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

Here we are, once again, at that fabled day of love and romance. Once a year, even though we probably don't recall why, we honor February 14th with red hearts, glittery cards, flowers and chocolates. Oh, there are the less common celebratory gifts; diamonds, sexy lingerie, semi-automatic weapons (yeah, seriously, one year my husband asked for one of these representations of pure romance to celebrate the day. I said no.)

So now, let the Valentine's accolades begin...

Wait!! What's that I hear? (picture me with my hand cupped around my ear, looking inquisitive). Is that a groan? A Valentine's groan?

Why???

Its the holiday of looo-ooove (say it with me now, looo-ooove, really rolling those 'o's' up and down like a teasing lil kid). We're trained young for this holiday, aren't we? I remember back in early gradeschool, taking a simple paper bag, adding colorful cutout hearts and pretty glitter and then :::ta da::: I had a magic bag.

Yes, magic. Because in that bag, I was assured, I would collect lots and lots of love come Valentine's Day!! To my seven-year-old heart, that meant chocolate, of course. (Come to think of it, to my older-than-seven-year-old heart, it means chocolate, too) I remember spending hours, painful hours since my handwriting was atrocious, signing those little paper valentines with cutesy animals saying clever things. Matching up just the right animal to just the right classmate. Agonizing over the perfect candy hearts (chocolate or conversation - oh the choices!). And then... dum da dum... the big day arrived. Thanks to the teacher's rule of 'participation means everyone', all the kids had valentines for all the other kids. So my paper bag was filled. With magic?

Well, in my lil' mind, magic meant my name was spelled right. And the chocolate? Magic chocolate melts in your mouth, but mine was kinda on the ick side. And that maybe, just maybe, my magic bag would have a loving little Valentine in it saying those special words: "Love, your Secret Admirer". Or, you know, anything romantic and sweet. But did it? Nope, never.

My magic Valentine's hopes were dashed.

Sigh... yeah, now I think I understand those groans I heard.

Valentine's expectations, be they good or bad, carry a lot of weight. Magic, love, good chocolate. That's a lot to ask of a day and one lil arrow-toting dude in a diaper.

And those amazingly talented guys in advertising only add to the weight of the day, drawing on all of the romantic hot buttons to sell their merchandise and get us thinking.

And yet, here I am, on still another Valentine's Day, wishing you all the magic of love. And because I'm a big believer in love and laughter going together like chocolate and caramel (mmmmm), how about some fun?

How about we spend the day celebrating by coming up with the cheesiest Valentine's greeting possible? Poetry isn't my strong suit, but I'll try and kick us off:

Roses are red

The stars shine from above

I want Johnny Depp

To be my hunka hunka burnin' love!

There... now that's really REALLY bad, right? My Valentine's challenge to you? Top my lack of talent with YOUR cheesy Valentine greeting.

And at the end of the day, I'll draw one name to win a valentine from me -a copy of any of my books and a box of truffles. The good, melt in your mouth kind. Not the ick kind!!