Women and Home Repairs

by Caren Crane

A few weeks ago, my best friend confessed that she had no water running from her kitchen faucet, although the side sprayer worked fine. Her husband has been dealing with a mother in very poor health, who lives 4-1/2 hours away from them. He has been trying to work his full-time job while also running her to dialysis, therapy, doctor's appointments and the hospital (which is 3 hours from where she lives). Bad situation and not one that is conducive to DIY plumbing repairs. They don't have money to call a plumber, so the faucet is still not working.

My friend has friends from out of town coming to stay in a little over a week, so the plumbing issue is making her anxious. After listening to her lament about it this week, I finally said the words I had been carefully holding back behind my bitten tongue ever since I first heard about the faucet. "Why don't you fix it yourself?"

As most women know, those words can put a strain on a friendship if not said with lots of love and every intention of pitching in to help. I said them with love and promptly began to offer help – from my desk at work, with links to articles and videos on the Internet. Every suggestion was met with stumbling blocks as to why it wouldn't work in her case. Finally, I realized the real issue was the same one I knew existed all along: my BFF, whom I love so dearly, is a Damsel In Distress.

Now, there is nothing wrong with being a Damsel In Distress. Most of the time, the Damsel flings her soft white hands in the air and rushes off to inform the closest male (significant other, relative, friend or co-worker) of her plight. He rushes in (or moseys over, or rolls his eyes) and fixes it (or promises to...someday or calls someone). I confess, I am not a Damsel In Distress, but I have played one on occasion, especially when it's computer-related and my techno-nerd husband is just upstairs. Or, you know, when I just don't feel like cleaning the dead bird off the porch or mucking out the gutters or whatever.


Damsels are very clever women, well-versed in the art of getting men (or other women) to do distasteful things for them. But they need lots of patience and I simply don't have enough! I tend to be more of a Rosie the Riveter. The kind of woman who rolls up her sleeves and gets things done, by gum. I come from a long line of Rosies and my mother and oldest sister were (and are) amazing DIY role models.


After my lovingly offered advice was dispensed, I took what was, perhaps, a rather unhealthy interest in my BFF's faucet with the stuck diverter (my diagnosis). I learned more about kitchen faucets this week than I ever wanted to know! I was determined we would fix it this weekend while her husband was out of town. I also figured if the Allen screw was corroded in place or something, I could always call my husband, Damsel-style, to come lend us his muscle. :P Then we found out it is impossible to get replacement parts for this particular faucet, so my poor BFF will have to get by with the sprayer alone until they can afford a new faucet. So much for me playing Rosie and getting things done! :(

So, are you a Damsel in Distress, willing and able to coax men (or other women) into riding to your rescue? Or are you a Rosie the Riveter, hitting the home improvement store for parts and the Internet (or even a man) for advice? And what is the toughest home repair you have either tackled yourself or convinced someone to tackle for you? I can't wait to hear your stories!

It's Finished!!

by Christie Kelley

Oh, how I wish I could say I was talking about my deadline book. But I’m not. I’m referring to the endless remodel. After a year of dust, cold, noise and people everywhere, we are done!

Now that doesn’t mean there aren’t still things to do. My office needs more decorating but right now with a deadline looming, I don’t care if my pictures aren’t hung. That will happen. After the book is finished.

Since I promised you all pictures when I was done, here they are. I thought I’d start with a “before” picture of the outside of the house. This is what it looked like when we bought the place four years ago. We actually bought the house not liking it, but we loved the community. That’s when the remodel idea started.

And here is the new exterior of the house...Yes, it is the same house!

I can say after 4.5 months of living in a 12x14 room with 1 king size bed, 1 queen size bed, 1 twin bed, a table and an entertainment console, it was worth it.

I LOVE my kitchen with two ovens, a big island and gas cooktop. I love the fact that the kids can be in the family room while I'm in the kitchen and I don’t miss a thing.

I love my office with a door!!! I’m sitting in it right now typing this up with a glass of wine on the desk (it’s 7pm on a Friday, I’m entitled).

So we made it. My husband and I are still married to each other. The kids don’t hate us or each other, so I think we survived. Not that is was rosy all the time. Don’t ask me about the week my husband went to St. Lucia with a friend and I was cooking in kitchen with my winter gloves on (true story).

And the biggest compliment of all was from my 16-year-old son, who today was sitting on the couch with the laptop, he turned to me and said, “I really like this room. It’s comfortable.”

If I have to have a point to this blog, I guess it’s that I'm happy to be able to overcome an obstacle. I think we all grew individually and as a family and for that, it was worth the hassles. Watch out, the wine is kicking in. All typos and missing words are definitely the fault of the wine.

My question to you all is, have you ever gone through something you thought was driving you crazy only to find it made you stronger? Any other home remodelers out there?

All That You Can't Leave Behind

by Susan Seyfarth

Every year when we get our tax refund, we tackle a house project. It's a long standing tradition, & since we have an endless list of Highly Desirable Home Improvements, I imagine it'll stand for years to come. But this year was special. This year we finally replaced our kitchen floor.


Happy, happy day. I have hated my kitchen floor with a virulent passion ever since I first laid eyes on it ten years ago. It was yellow & white linoleum with a fake brick print & 30 years of dirt ground into every stinkin' crack & scratch. And there were LOTS of them. I could (and did) get down on my knees & scrub the thing with Comet until my fingers pruned up. Ten minutes later, it looked exactly as dirty as it did when I started.


Now my kitchen floor is a yummy, warm terra cotta colored tile & it's gorgeous. But it took a very nice man two solid weeks to put it in, during which time every single item that used to live in the kitchen had to find a new home somewhere else. (The linoleum we had removed was full of asbestos, so we had to REALLY empty the place out.) I had the fridge & the stove in the dining room. The canned goods went into big laundry baskets in the living room. The dishes & tupperware went into the basement. My laptop became a sort of migrant worker (which I'm sad to say explains my lack of presence on the blog lately. ) And so on & so forth.


As I put everything away, I thought how on earth am I going to get by without THIS for two weeks? This carrot peeler? My favorite paring knife? This cute little sauce pan? Two weeks later, I unpacked those same boxes & threw away like 2/3s of the junk. Because that's all it was. Junk. I mean, really. I had four cans of cream of celery soup, expiration date 1999. Did I really think I was going to stick that back in my pantry? It was just proximity that made all my junk seem necessary. Familiarity that make it seem vital.


It's the same phenomenon that makes a book I could have sworn was finished looked like h-e-double-hockey-sticks when I drag it out from under the bed a year later. It makes me wonder what else in my life I've been dragging around just because I'm used to it, not because I need it.

How about you? Have you ever had an epiphany? Something that happened that gave you fresh eyes? A new perspective? A paradigm shift? Tell us about it!