Ahhhhhh--chooooo!!!

By Kirsten Scott

I don't know about the rest of you, but in my little corner of the world, this has been one of the worst cold seasons in memory. Everyone I know is either sick, or getting over being sick, or worried about getting sick. I am personally thanking the steroid-god who delivered me from the land of the endless cough, and my kids are grateful for their friend Zithromax, who, along with best buddy Cough-Syrup-with-Codeine, helped them sleep through the night and get over their own little germ fests.

The land of the living cold has me thinking about how we writers are always looking for new ways to crawl into the skin of our characters and understand them better. We talk about tormenting our characters alot, and what better way to do that than to give them a cold? The way a person reacts to physical stress--be it an illness or an injury--tells us a lot about them, and the way a writer handles illness tells you a lot about how deep they are digging to get their characters right.

For example, you'll often see the stereotypical alpha male refusing help when he's sick, or being stoic when injured. But more interesting to me is the guy who falls apart when he's sick and has to accept being vulnerable and needing help. Or what about the powerful leader who can apply his own tourniquet but panics when the heroine has a fever? Now that's a real human being, one with flaws and weaknesses along with his strength.

Along those lines, forget the perfect heroine who martyrs her way through her flu, cold, and discomfort. I'd much rather read about a real person who gets whiney, or feels sorry for herself, and has to be teased out of her funk. Isn't there a great scene in You've Got Mail where Tom Hanks visits Meg Ryan when she's sick? Anyone remember that one? Or what about all those Catherine Coulter historicals where it seems like someone always gets a fever and has to be nursed back to health. I love those. There's something wonderfully real and timeless about a fever, or a cold. I don't care if you're in the Regency or the good-old-US-of-A--having a cold sucks, and we all know exactly what it feels like.

But back to me.

A little part of me likes the idea of having a cold. Unlike migraines, which I get a lot, a cold is something tangible. Snot pours out of you. Your nose gets red. Your voice gets scratchy. Then there's the cough. Add it together and what do you get?

Sympathy. Lots of yummy sympathy.

That's cool for about...oh...24 to 48 hours. Then I get pissed. I hate being sick. I hate not sleeping. I hate coughing. I hate all the healthy people around me who have the audacity NOT to be sick when I'm suffering so miserably. I get bitter. I huddle at my desk with a cup full of theraflu and try not to yell at everyone who is unfortunate enough to enter my office.

Things get ugly fast.

Of course, eventually I just become pitiful. I drink cup after cup of tea (which exacerbates my problem with finding time to go to the bathroom) and stand in the shower so long the room fills with steam and the walls drip. And then, after a few weeks, I finally break down and go to the doctor. Eventually, though it seems like I'll never be healthy again, I start to sleep through the night. Life returns to normal.

So what about you? Been sick lately? Do you hate being sick, or secretly enjoy the sympathy? What's your being sick ritual? Hot tea, warm bath, netti pot? My cough could return at any moment, and I want to be prepared!