Thursday, May 28, 2009

Burning Questions About Weird Stuff

Since today is my regular day to blog and I'm a little busy playing grandma to my new grandson, my very good friend, Nancy Haddock has kindly agreed to host the blog today. Please welcome Nancy, and check out her new book, The Last Vampire Standing...

Hellloooo, Banditas! It’s a kick to be back with you, and mucho mondo thanks to Suz for inviting me!

I’ve done a good many blogs lately, a number of them on the serious side. Today, we’re having fun! After all, it’s still the launch month of my book Last Vampire Standing, so let’s keep the party going! (And, yes, darlings, there is a copy of my new release up for grabs to those who leave a comment!)

So, does anyone remember the film Jumpin’ Jack Flash? There’s a scene in which Whoopi Goldberg’s character, Terry Dolittle, poses the question, “What is Martinizing?” She wondered about stuff like that.

Of course, Googling provided the Martinizing answer. But what about questions Google and the Internet can’t answer? I have burning questions about weird stuff, and perhaps you’ve wondered about these, too. To wit:

Why do weather people only have to be right 10% of the time to keep their jobs? Did they only have to be 10% right on their meteorology exams?

Does antimatter matter not? If so (or not), why are scientists making it?

Why is the green M&M the only “female?”

Do aliens take pictures of Earth and beam them home? Are we making funny faces in the pictures?

Why did advertising folks corrupt words like Light to Lite and Glow to Glo? Did the containers get too small to hold the correctly spelled word?

When the magnetic poles reverse, will water in the northern hemisphere drain counterclockwise?

If a late flight can “make up time in the air,” why don’t planes fly faster all the time?

Why does it take four supervisors to watch one construction worker do his job?

Which fragrances combine to make up New Car Smell?

Why do our legs take longer to tan than other parts of us?

Where are all the lost socks? In parallel universes, with parallel washers and dryers, do they lose their socks, too? Are there enough lost single socks floating around somewhere to make pairs again?

If someone is out to get you, and you’re not paranoid about it, is there something wrong with you?

Okay, your turn. Come on, now, I know you have your own burning questions about weird stuff, so leave a comment and spill. Can’t think of a question? Jo-Jo the Jester, the stand-up comic in Last Vampire Standing, is still looking for material, so leave your suggestion for a vampire joke. If you’re a published author, please also leave your web URL or title of your last or upcoming book. I like sharing the stage!

For more opportunities to win a book, see the Beach Party page on Nancy’s web site –


Christine Wells said...

Nancy, a huge welcome to the lair. Loved your post. It was hilarious!

I wonder, too, about socks and that parallel universe. My dh never seems to have enough socks. Either that, or I don't do enough laundry. Ahem! Wish I could find the portal to sock-universe, though! Then he'd have a constant supply.

I must say that cover is stunning, Nancy. Did you have any say in it? Is it what you envisaged? Tell us more about Last Vampire Standing!

PinkPeony said...

Welcome Nancy. Beautiful cover! Hi Christine!

This might sound a little twisted but I've always wondered where the dead birds go. That is, there are birds all over and with so many, you'd think you'd run across a dead one from time to time, but I never see any. Weird.

And the saying, "For Pete's sake!"...okay, who is Pete and did he forsake something?

Do I think we're visited by aliens...yes! For all we know, our solar system is a particle of dirt in a thumbnail of a giant somtheing. And for some reason, that reminds me of this t.v. show when I was a kid called "Land of the Giants". :)

Anna Campbell said...

Christine! You haven't won the chook for ages. And you're so busy with your latest book (or should that be bok?) that you won't be able to supervise him? Oh, the trouble he'll get into doesn't bear thinking about.

Nancy, what a brilliant post! Thank you for stepping in for Suz.

Actually I think the antimatter and the socks are closely related. You know, the inevitable suck of gravity is actually the inevitable SOCK of gravity. Or is it black holes I mean? Or do the holes in white socks count?

Actually this is a true story and on the odd rather than funny side. But when I travelled around Spain in 1985, every time we were on a highway, there was one high-heeled shoe on the edge. Different shoes, obviously, but WHY ONE?? Always? Were there lots of senoritas hopping around on one stiletto?

Anna Campbell said...

Actually, Jen, I think For Pete's sake is related to St Peter. I'm happy to be corrected!

Anna Campbell said...

Actually a really basic one, why does it never rain when I have an umbrella and it always does when I haven't got one?

babygirlG said...

I've got a couple of vampire jokes :

Q: Where does Dracula water ski?
A: On Lake Erie

Q: What kind of ship does Dracula own?
A: Blood vessel.

Ok Maybe these aren't what Jo-Jo is looking for, but I had a good laugh!

Helen said...

Congrats Christine have fun with him

What a great post Nancy and yes the socks have always been something that I wonder about having 4 kids we were always missing them but the kids did get to make lots of sock puppets.

I too love the cover of your new book Nancy very nice.

Suz I know you will be having fun with your new grandson they are just so special.

Have Fun

magolla said...

Hi Nancy!
Wish I had something witty to ask, but the coffee hasn't kicked in yet!

Lisa Cooke said...

Hi Nancy, I my latest release TEXAS HOLD HIM, my hero is teaching my heroine how to play poker and she asks what a "jack" is in a deck of cards. A king and queen rule a country (and should be powerful cards) but what exactly is a Jack, anyway?
Thanks for a cute blog! (and for the invite to plug our books LOL)

Blodeuedd said...

Hi Nancy :)

My poor mind is blank after a hard days work. As for jokes, nope.

But love the cover

Louisa Cornell said...

Great post, Nancy. I needed the laugh this morning!

Christine!! Keep that naughty chook in line please.

Bok? La Campbell? GROAN and SNORK!

Why does it ALWAYS rain after you wash your car?

Why do dogs chase cars? What do they think they will do with a car once they catch it? (I ask my Houdini dog this all the time. We call her Houdini because she can escape almost any fence and / or dog run. I want to hire her out to test prisons and jails.)

Love your cover, Nancy!

Suzanne Welsh said...

Morning, Christine! Congrats on getting the Golden Rooster this morning. Got any great plans for him?

The sock mystery is an age old one, isn't it? As a teen ager one of my daughters used to come out in the mornings with two totally mismatched socks, (one blue print, one solid red). When I'd ask her about it, she'd say, "I have another pair just like them somewhere." :)

And you should see the cover of Last Vampire Standing in's irridescent!

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Pink Peony!

And the saying, "For Pete's sake!"...okay, who is Pete and did he forsake something?..

I always wonder about the phrase, "You don't know Jack." How do people know I don't know Jack. I had an uncle and a brother in law named Jack, but I didn't know them well before they died, so I guess I "didn't know Jack well".

I have a good friend with a son named Jack. When people say that to her family members, they can say..."actually, I do."

Suzanne Welsh said...

Morning, Anna!

But when I travelled around Spain in 1985, every time we were on a highway, there was one high-heeled shoe on the edge. Different shoes, obviously, but WHY ONE??..

Or have you ever been to a small town and seen someone's tied pair of shoes hanging over the power line? How did they get up there? Who put them there? How'd they do it without getting electrocuted?

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey BabygirlG!

Cute jokes... I felt like I needed a drum/cymbal hit, ba-da-bump, after them. :)

Q: Where does a vampire keep his money?
A: A Blood Bank

Suzanne Welsh said...

Good morning, Helen!

Thank you for the congrats on my grandson. He is beautiful, and so far he's a typical male. Doesn't cry too much, and only grunts when he wants something! LOL

Suzanne Welsh said...

Morning, Magolla!

Early morning coffee drinkers are always welcome in the Lair. Feel free to join us on the sun deck!

Cecile said...

Oh My Gosh... Thanks for the laugh.. I ofter wonder too about the sock thing... I think as women, we have all had that problem!

Love the book, the cover is awesome!

Why is it that when someone calls your house phone, they have a tendency to ask if you are home? Didn't I answer the phone.

Where does all the laundry come from... I live with hubby and daughter and you would swear I am washing clothes for 100 people every day!

And where does dust come from... that even after we dust furniture, you can see it floating in the air... laughing and mocking you... because it knows as soon as you wipe.. it will land right back down!!

Love the post... oh and I loved the joke about the vampire boat!
Hope you ladies are having a great day!

Nancy said...

Good Morning, Bandits and Friends!

Christine, Pink Peony,Blodeuedd, Louisa and all, thank you for the cover compliment! Suz is right - this puppy shimmers with cover bling, and so did La Vida's cover. Berkley has gifted me with amazing covers! I had very little input on either, but did suggest colors of clothing. Cesca doesn't do the all black thang. :)

More in a moment. I, too, need to slug more coffee!


Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Lisa!

A king and queen rule a country (and should be powerful cards) but what exactly is a Jack, anyway?..

In earlier centuries the Jack used to be called a knave. But in the mid nineteenth century, the card manufacturers started putting letter or number values on the cards, K,Q,10, K and Kn (for knave) was wha-la, they changed it to Jack. Why that instead of Fred? I have NNNoooooooooo idea!!

Susan Sey said...

Christine with the GR! Way to go!

As for unanswerable but important questions, I have always wondered about un- words that have no corresponding positive.

Unwieldy, for example. When have you ever heard of a package that was delightfully wieldy?

Untoward. ("What a beautifully toward statement!")

Disgruntled. ("I find myself so pleasantly gruntled by this turn of events!")

I also have a basket in which I keep the orphaned socks, on the off chance the washer/dryer barfs them out again. But I do wonder about these little orphaned words, & what they do to the universe's overall balance.

And here's my favorite joke. I'm pretty sure you can rearrange it to fit any animal group, but I like cows. You ready?

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Interrupting cow.

Interupting cow wh--


Heh. Still makes me laugh.

Suzanne Welsh said...

Morning Blodeuedd!

The Lair is always a fun and peaceful place to hang out after work, isn't it? Pull up a chair over on the sun deck by Magolla!

Suzanne Welsh said...

Morning, Louisa!

Why does it ALWAYS rain after you wash your car?..

Here's one I've been wondering, why is it on days I have off from work I have to fight to get a page or two written, but on the days I have to go to work, they words pour onto the page?

Suzanne Welsh said...

Here's another one. Luckily, I do not have to wake up to an alarm clock for work. But why is it when you do have to set an alarm, you inevitably wake up 5 minutes before it is scheduled to go off?

Nancy said...

Christine, you asked about Last Vampire Standing. First, the title is the brain child of Bandits friend, Sandy Blair. I screwed up the acknowledgments, and Sandy's paragraph never made it to copy, so here's a shout out - thank you, Sandy!

In LVS, Cesca's "normal" afterlife is back on track until Jo-Jo the Jester blows into town to beg help in pursuing a stand-up comic career. Problem one is that he's the funniest when he doesn't intend to be. Problem two is that Ike of the Daytona Beach vamps thinks Cesca is setting up her own nest. Then there are flying lessons and death threats on the way to solving another murder.

Guess you can tell that I had tons of fun with this book. :)

Congrats on grabbing the prize for first post, Christine! It's a treat to see you here today!


Suzanne Welsh said...

Morning, Cecile!

Why is it that when someone calls your house phone, they have a tendency to ask if you are home? Didn't I answer the phone...

LOL....that one is very funny!

Nancy said...

Pink Peony, good morning! You know, I don't see as many bird bodies as I used to either, tho that might be a function of where I live now. Hmmm.

I'm laughing about "Land of the Giants." I with you on that! I wonder, too, if aliens come here for vacation or penance. And do alien children ask, "Are we there yet?"

Have a day filled with laughter!


Lisa Cooke said...

Thanks, Suzanne, for the info on the knave/Jack thingy. That's interesting, but like you, I wonder why they didn't go with Fred or Reginald or something ;-)

Here's another question: If our tires wear out by driving on the road, why aren't there several inches of rubber on all the highways?

jo robertson said...

Hi, Nancy, welcome back to the Lair. I enjoyed La Vida Vampire and look forward to your new release.

Hilarious post! I love those questions. My favorite one is, "inflammable" means something can easily burst into flames and "non-flammable" means it can't. Why, then, did we need a new word ("flammable") to explain the volatile nature of a substance?

Nancy said...

Anna, the shoes thing in Spain? That IS odd! Suz, so is the shoes on power lines thing. I've wondered about that, too.

I love your Sock of Gravity and black holes in white socks theories! You're on to something! And the umbrella v rain issue - so true!

Helen, hi! Okay, I see now that sock puppets are the upside of the Sock of Gravity. Did one of the pairs sacrifice itself for the sake of puppetry? Hmmm.

Louisa, I'm laughing about Houdini testing prisons. Great idea! And the car v rain issue - so true, and it applies to watering the lawn, plants, etc. as well. Weird.

Cecile, the "are you home?" thing into the answering machine is priceless! And the dust thing! OMG, yes! At best we relocate those pesky particles. Or do they gravitate back to their own spots?

Susan! I love your un- balanced words comment! I've always wanted to say I was quite gruntled by something, just to see people's faces!

Thanks to all of you for popping in! I'll be back in a moment!


Nancy said...

Lake Erie. Blood vessel. Blood bank. Babygirl and Suz, these are great!

And if you make a donation to a blood bank, is it tax deductible?

Susan, the interrupting cow joke is darling. Bet Jo-Jo can twist that to have a vampire take. :)

Our crack research team (not ON crack, BTW) has done a marvelous job of answering the Pete and Jack questions, but JO, I hear you on the flammable, inflammable, non- flammable. Sounds like scientific flimflam to me!

Lisa, it's a good thing I didn't have a mouthful of coffee when I read your rubber on the roads question! Where DOES all that rubber go?

And, oh, Suz, the alarm clock thing! Is that maddening or what? So is the pages-pouring-out-when- you-have-to-work thing. Is that because writing endorphins kick in under time pressure? Beats me!

Be back in a few!


Pissenlit said...

I would very much like to know why my watch has a tendency to fluctuate between being 5 minutes fast, right on time and 5 minutes slow without any help from me. When it adjusts itself, it always does so in 5 minute increments. It doesn't do it often but I always have to compare my watch to a clock before leaving the house. I don't think my watch likes me.

Hmmm. Can't think of any vampire jokes at the moment.

Enid Wilson said...

Nancy your cover looks stunning. I like your question about M&M. I love M&M and we have a new ad here where the white M&M was singing and apologising to the red one.

At the end the red M&M forgave the white one but the red one said "no hugging". My question is will they melt if two M&Ms hug?

Steamy Darcy

Nancy said...

Magolla, hope your coffee is kicking in, and I thank you for stopping by! No pressure do do anything but chill.

Suz, hug your newest grandbaby for me!

Ahhh, it's so nice here on the sundeck!

I'll continue to check in and respond throughout the day, so keep the comments and coffee coming!


Suzanne Welsh said...

Morning, Nancy!

Hope it's a beautiful day down there by the beach today!

I've been wondering, is there a third book in the Vampire series planned? If so, when is it coming out? (I must make room on the TBR pile for it!)

Suzanne Welsh said...

We call her Houdini because she can escape almost any fence and / or dog run. I want to hire her out to test prisons and jails...

Louisa...Rocky-the-wonder-dog escapes from our back yard on a regular basis. We bring him home, (or he wanders back), we fix the hole and we swear he spends the next week looking for the next weak link. My daughter calls it "The Great Escape--the puppy version".

So, does that mean I have the Steve McQueen of dogs?

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Susan!

As for unanswerable but important questions, I have always wondered about un- words that have no corresponding positive...

If Impossible means without possibility, and Improbable means without probability, does Implement mean without plement? And if so, what is a plement?

Suzanne Welsh said...

Morning, Jo!

I too loved Nancy's post. Chuckled the whole time I was posting it!!

Suzanne Welsh said...

Oh here's something that has always bothered me.

WHY do we have appendixes? I mean, the only purpose I've ever seen them have is to get infected and need removing.

And if you have your gall bladder removed, does that mean you no longer have any gall? (Which I can answer, does not happen!!)

Suzanne Welsh said...

Morning Pissenlit!

Do you ever wonder who the first person was who decided to put a watch on their arm? I mean they looked at their arm and thought what? "Gee that would be a great place for a clock to hang out."

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Enid!
At the end the red M&M forgave the white one but the red one said "no hugging". My question is will they melt if two M&Ms hug?..

I love the ad where the green M&M is all sexy and the others melt, and she says, "That's not supposed to happen." :)

Tracy Garrett said...

Hi Nancy & Banditas!

My burning question: If the Star Trek world has moved beyond belief in a supreme being, when Captain Picard surveys the barren world he just crashed on, why are the first words out of his mouth "Dear God"?

LVS is sitting on my desk, calling to me. Can't wait for the weekend so I can curl up with it. Congrats on the release!

Christie Kelley said...

Nancy, what a great post. I was so glad I didn't have coffee in my mouth as I read your list of weird things.

The sock thing is a huge problem in my house. And if there is a parallel universe, why am I not receiving any of their socks? I could use a few extras.

Tracy Garrett said...

Nancy, since LVS is making so much cosmic noise, I cracked the cover to read a page or 11. It isn't going to make it to the weekend. I think some extra reading time tonight is in order. (You are so hard on my page count, woman!) :D

Minna said...

Vampire jokes? Let's see...

Aikakone - Keltainen

MAARIT Tuuli & Taivas (Wind & Sky)


Neiti Kevät

Pave Maijanen - Lähtisitkö

Tomas Ledin - Sommaren är kort

Tawny said...

ROFLMAO Nancy. What a fun -and thought provoking- post!!! I swear, I've asked myself so many of those same questions!!!

And, of course, I make up answers to them all too. Like the green M&M -remember the myth back in the day that green M&M's made you horny? I'll bet thats why they make the green one female...

Minna said...

"Mom, I don't wanna eat this soup."
"Be quiet and eat it before it clots!"

6 ANGEL - Die Another Day [David Boreanaz]

ANGEL - Love Song For A Vampire

Annie Lennox- Love Song For A Vampire

D.J. BoBo - Vampires are Alive

Nancy said...

Pissenlit, LOL about the exact 5 minutes your watch fluctuates. Maybe it has to do with your own electomagnetic field?

The clock in one of my cars steadily gains time but not in precise increments.

Enid, great question about M&Ms hugging! I guess the melting would depend on the steaminess of the hug! :)

Suz, I love that sexy M&M ad, too. Fun-nee! TAWNY, green M&Ms were supposed to make you horny? Dang, why didn't I know this when it would've done me more good?!

Minna - "eat it before it clots?" ROTF! I'll check out all the links you sent - thank you!

Christie, it does seem that the parallel universe sock thing is one-way, doesn't it? Can you hear the nightly news?

"Today the city was again pelted with socks. There seems to be no pattern to this rain of socks, and worse, none of them match. The mayor advises citizens to put a sock in it. And in other news ..."

Suz, I'm chucking over all your posts, and I'll get to your question about Book 3 shortly!


Nancy said...

Lisa, I love the name of your book - Texas Hold Him! You're welcome for the offering to plug yourself / your books!

So will your hero explain the Jack to the heroine???


Nancy said...

"My burning question: If the Star Trek world has moved beyond belief in a supreme being, when Captain Picard surveys the barren world he just crashed on, why are the first words out of his mouth "Dear God"?"

ROTFLMAO, Tracy! You always crack me up! And, awww, thank you for the supreme compliment re: reading LVS! Since I don't want to be hard on your page count, put the book down and back away to your keyboard. Don't make me come up there! (Oh, wait, DO!)


Nancy said...

Suz, you kindly asked about Book 3 in the series. I am working on the book while waiting for another contract.

The next installment will see Cesca and Triton - in the flesh this time - confronting each other about their past and future. We'll learn what all Triton's been up to, and how he, Cesca and Saber work together to solve the next mystery. And, yes, they do get closer to exposing and defeating the Void. A bit of a twist ending will open the 4th book (if the publishing gods are kind) in an unexpected location.

I'm hoping for 5-7 books in the series total.

QUICK NOTE: We have another thunderbummer building fast, so if I'm gone for a bit, it's just the storm.

Hope y'all are having a fabulously fun day - I sure am!


Pat Cochran said...

Thanks for visiting today, Nancy!

I am so dizzy, my head is spinning
from all the questions/situations you have posed! It's going to take
me sometime to clear my head enough
to present a question. I'll be

Pat Cochran

Donna MacMeans said...

Darn it - I'm late to the blog and already missed a lot of fun!

Congrats Christine on nabbing the GR. Which reminds me of a silly question for Nancy's compilation.

This also is true. While doing research for the latest, I had to check on the history of turnstiles. One questioner asked - due to his location in Australia, can the turnstiles be made to turn backwards? (he-he-he)

Hi Nancy - Welcome back to the lair! Love the concept of the Last Vampire Standing. (Fang you, Fang you very much.) Now to finish reading the comments.

Caffey said...

Hi Nancy! Great to chat with you! My burning question is:

Why is it when you get your haircut and love it, you come back to the same person and say you want it the same but it doesn't come out that way?!?!

I know you weren't asking about this, but have to share! I do remember the movie Jumpin' Jack Flash. Since I'm deaf, my hubby who was dating me then, took me to see the movie and there was no captioning. I couldn't follow the movie so I went to sleep. I went to sleep on my first date!!! LOL. (He married me anyways!) He still tells me he plans to get that DVD and have me stay awake and watch it with him, LOL.

I am so looking forward to THE LAST VAMPIRE STANDING!! This was a fun post

Donna MacMeans said...

Mmmm Suz - there's a reason for those shoes on the power line. They're put there purposively as a signal for the nepharious folks who can read such things. (The same folks who can read the messages in gang graffiti).

Addison Fox said...


Congratulations on the new release - like Tracy, I'm itching to grab it off my TBR pile!! :-)

So my cosmic question for the universe....why do they have locks on 24 hour establishments? If it never closes and the doors must remain unlocked at all times, what's the point?


Anna Campbell said...

Hey, these are great! OK, another great mystery - why is it whenever I'm early for the bus, the bus is late, and when I'm just a fraction late, the bus is always on time and I miss it? It happens too often to be coincidental. It must be part of some great cosmic plan. Perhaps we should ask Captain Picard!

terrio said...

What a fun day around here. LOL! These are all cracking me up.

The only one I can think of are the old standby...

Why do we drive on a parkway and park in a driveway?

And why is it my best hair days are the days I have no reason to leave the house?

The worst one, why is it everytime I put something in a special place so as not to forget where I put it, I can't remember where that special place is?

Diana Cosby said...

LOL! Great questions. Okay, as a retired meteorologist/oceanographer, I have to comment on one:
"Why do weather people only have to be right 10% of the time to keep their jobs? Did they only have to be 10% right on their meteorology exams?"

*G* Weather forecasters tend to be right a higher percentage, but the general population remember the busts.

**A forecaster's chuckle - why being a weather forecaster is the perfect job:
Weather forecasting is the only job where people expect you to be wrong, you still get paid, and they come back for more.

Okay, no big mystery questions, but I had to comment. I do love the earth's magnetics question. *G* Fabulous blog - as usual!

2009 Booksellers Best Finalist

B.G. Sanford said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Jennie Bentley said...

The shoes on powerlines are kids. They're throwing their sneakers up there, either to see if they can get them to stay, or because they want a new pair. With flashing lights, I guess. You know how often fashions change. And no, I'm not kidding. I remember from when I was a kid.

I fully intend to get you to sign me a copy of Cesca 2 next week, Nancy, just so you're prepared. :) And the cover IS fantastic. Berkley did me right on mine, too. They don't look anything like yours, but they're gorgeous.

Tracy Garrett said...

Anna wrote: why is it whenever I'm early for the bus, the bus is late, and when I'm just a fraction late, the bus is always on time and I miss it?... Perhaps we should ask Captain Picard!"
Anna, he'd just look around and say "Dear God." lol

Anna Campbell said...

Tracey, you're so right! Although I wouldn't mind him saying "Dear Anna" instead...

Actually on the subject of those shoes, I used to live very near the route of the City to Surf race in Sydney where people run from the CBD to Bondi Beach, a few miles. Anyway, it's in August so it's cold and people start out dressed for the weather and then as they run they cast off their clothing, usually onto a convenient bush. After the race, it really looks like Sydney's streets are lined with clothes trees!

Edie Ramer said...

Great post, Nancy! There's a reason why "dog-breath" is a derogatory name. So how can their mouths have less germs than our mouths?

Beth said...

Welcome back to the lair, Nancy! Congrats on the release of The Last Vampire Standing. I can't wait to read it *g*

What a fun blog! I have many burning questions such as:

Why am I the only one who is able to put a new roll of toilet paper on the tp holder?

When my son does laundry, why does he put my daughter's size 0 jeans and some of his own T-shirts (which he knows are his) on my bed?

How come I can know so much about a story while I'm brainstorming and forget it all while I'm writing?


~Sia McKye~ said...

Burning questions , hmmmm
Why is it that even when a man is listening, he is going to get
it wrong?

Ever feel as if you have all the solutions, but in the search for them forgot the questions?

Anyway, fun article, ma'am!

Pissenlit said...

Suzanne Welsh - Do you ever wonder who the first person was who decided to put a watch on their arm? I mean they looked at their arm and thought what? "Gee that would be a great place for a clock to hang out."

It was Bob. And yes, that's exactly what he thought. ;)

Nancy - Pissenlit, LOL about the exact 5 minutes your watch fluctuates. Maybe it has to do with your own electomagnetic field?

I'd prefer to blame it on awesome time traveling skills. *grin* However, I can believe the electromagnetic field explanation. Sometimes computers don't like me either. Then there were the number of times where my spiffy mp3 player froze on me.

As for the lost socks conspiracy? I'd really appreciate it if those black holes or parallel universes would return my translucent black top with the fancy sleeves and little ties at the elbows. I'd be willing to overlook the sock thefts.

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Tracy G!

Don't you know better than to open a book by a favorite writer while you're still supposed to be writing? It's like I never open a favorite writer's book before bed, coz, I'll be up all day, er, night reading instead of sleeping!!

Nancy said...

Pat, take your time!

Donna, I love the Fang you very much! LOL about the turnstile story - that is priceless! AND, congratulations again on your Prism final!

Caffey, you're so right about the hair cut thing. Even if you go to the same stylist for years, it's always different. BTW, do you sign? I need to brush up so I can better talk with a new friend here in St. Aug. She's patient with my signing, but I need to improve!

Addison, I about burst something laughing about the 24 hours establishments having locks. Great observation!!

Anna, the bus issue had me grinning. Is that a self- fulfilling prophecy sort of deal?

Terrio! OMG, the case of the safe place black hole, yes! I do the same thing, and it drives me nuts when my stuff is gone. What IS that?

Diana, I love your weatherman joke - the kicker of coming back for more had me nodding like a bobble head doll!

Jennie, Berkley did do a total fab job on your covers! And you did a fab job on your book - I loved it! I can hardly wait to see you next week!!

Anna, I forgot to say earlier that my daughter was recently in Sydney and LOVED it! LOL about the clothes trees!

Speaking of clothes, Pissenlit, I sure hope your get the black top back from the universe. It sounds adorable!

More in a moment!


Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Christie!

Can you imagine the mom's in the parallel universe? "Where do these extra socks come from? I have three of every kind!"

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Tawny!

Yes! Someone else who knew about the green M&M's and if a boy gave you that M&M...well, good things were meant to ensue!!

Nancy said...

Beth, you named the other classic aside from socks - the toilet paper roll caper! Gack! That drives me nuts! I always wanted to hide my own stash and see how long it took hubby or the kids to act on the problem!

Sia, I love your comment about having the answers but losing the questions. Yes! And that dovetails with BETH's comment about knowing the story when you brainstorm, but not when you're writing. That's one storm I want to stick around!

Edie, you're right about the dog's breath, too. So if those aren't germs we smell, what are they? Oh, wait, is that one answer we can do without? :)

Taking a quick break to observe the sun peeking back out. Be back soon!


Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Donna!

Your Australia comment made me wonder...who was the guy, (and you know it was a guy) who stood in front of a toilet there, or here and said..."wait a minute it's swirling the wrong direction!"

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Caffey!

I've always had a hair question...Why is it that when your hair gets long enough or relaxes for a perm enough that you like it, the result only lasts about a day or two?

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Addison!!

Speaking of 24 hour places...Why do people ask me at work, "Are you open all night?" Duh, we're a hospital, we're open 24/7/365.

Then there's the patient who asks, "Where do you sleep?" I have to refrain from saying..."In the room next door, so please be quiet." hehehe

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Terrio!

The worst one, why is it everytime I put something in a special place so as not to forget where I put it, I can't remember where that special place is?..

And if it's my husband, he figure I know where his special place to hide things is! (And I usually do.)

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Diana!

Loved the Weather joke!

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Jennie!

If I tried to toss a pair of tied sneakers onto a powerline all I'd end up with is a headache from the shoes hitting me in the head as they fell!

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Edie!

I don't know why, but "they" say that you'll get more of an infection from a human bite than a canine. Of course, I'm thinking the canine would scare me a whole heck of a lot more!

Suzanne Welsh said...

Hey Beth!

When my son does laundry, why does he put my daughter's size 0 jeans and some of his own T-shirts (which he knows are his) on my bed?..

I'd take the "0" sized jeans as a MAJOR compliment from the boy!

J K Maze said...

Why does too many cooks spoil the broth? What does the "Extra" cook do to ruin it?

Joan K. Maze

J K Maze said...

In the Verizon ad, what did they do with all the sprinkles they spilled out? And what happens to the clerk?

Joan Maze

Nancy said...

Christine, congratulations on taking home the bird. I hope you'll keep him very, very busy and work him very, very hard.

Hi, Nancy--Welcome! What a fun post. I second what everyone has said about your gorgeous cover. It's wonderful.

My question is a corollary to Anna Campbell's - why does it always rain on those rare occasions when I've just washed the car even if the sky was clear earlier?

The sock thing is huge. If you figure out how to retrieve those things, you'll make a fortune.

Nancy said...

Anna Campbell wrote: every time we were on a highway, there was one high-heeled shoe on the edge.

The dh had a relative who was a bit of a kleptomanic but stole only left shoes. After she died, they found scads of them hidden around the house. Seriously.

Maybe the answer is related to the reason shoes slung over wires are always sneakers.

Pat Cochran said...

Someone mentioned permed hair and that reminded of an instance that
puzzles me. When you get a perm,
you are instructed to return every
few weeks for a trim to keep the
curl from getting out of hand. Yet
when you do, you lose curl as well
as control of your hairdo! What's
up with that??

Pat Cochran

Neringa said...

Why is it when I get stuck behind a slow car, I find the driver inevitable wearing a hat?

What's Dracula's favorite soup?
Scream of tomato !

Nancy, reading the blogs was a blast. Thanks for hosting.

Pat Cochran said...

You hear about people getting their
cars "'jacked." Yet, to me a jack
is a instrument used to raise one's
car when you need to change tires.
The puzzle? Why would someone go
around jacking someone's car up and
leaving them stranded? Wouldn't it
be a simple task to lower the car
and drive off?? (I think I need a
nap!! LOL.)

Pat Cochran

Nancy said...

"I'd take the "0" sized jeans as a MAJOR compliment from the boy!"

Suz, I'm with you there!

Joan, I always wondered abut that, too. Does that extra cook do add too much salt? Oh, and the sprinkles in that ad, yes! LOL!

Nancy, good ones! I also wonder why, when my car NEEDS a bath, it won't rain.

Pat, the hair thing IS a puzzlement, though I'm thinking those trims that make you lose curl then promotes getting another perm. :)

Neringa, I'm still snorting about Scream of Tomato soup! Too funny! I don't notice the slow drivers wearing hats, but have noted men of a certain age who driver convertibles are often bald. Talk about gone with the wind! :)

Today is too much fun! Thanks again to all who've popped in to say hi! I hope I'll get to see many of you at RWA!


Nancy said...

LOL, Pat! I don't know jack about getting jacked up or high jacked, but isn't our language a wonderment?


Maggie Toussaint said...

Cool topic, Nancy! I want to know why they don't blunt the edges of paper so we don't get paper cuts. And I also want to know why light bulbs don't start to shine a different color just before they go, like a day or two so that you can be sure you have a replacement bulb.

And it makes me nervous to call my portable USB storage devise a flash drive. If that thing flashes its breasts at me I'm out of here.

It is also a mystery to me why you never run out of ink in a pen when you have a spare. And why is it that we can't find our glasses when they are on our noses? Shouldn't we be able to notice that we are seeing clearly?

Enough wackiness. Take care my FCRW friend.

Nancy said...

Hi Maggie! I love your light bulb idea, and LOL about the flash drive. And what are most of those puppies shaped like, hmmm?

Oh, and the ink pens! I wonder how many pens writers have in their offices, on average.

Thanks so much for stopping in!


Jessica Scott said...

The sock thing is true even over here in Iraq. We are slowly running out of green wool socks with no way to replenish them!

Nancy said...


Since I've had so very much fun with y'all today, and since I just got the news a few minutes ago, I want to share it here first.

La Vida Vampire is a finalist in the Daphne du Maurier contest.

Squeee! I'm so thrilled!


Anna Campbell said...

Nancy, this has been great fun! Thanks for popping by!

Anna Campbell said...

Nancy, congratulations on the Daphne final! Fantastic news!

Nancy said...

"The sock thing is true even over here in Iraq. We are slowly running out of green wool socks with no way to replenish them!"

Gads, Jessica! I didn't imagine having that problem in Iraq, too! Clearly, Something Must Be Done!

Please take care of you!


Nancy said...

Anna, my sincere thanks to all of YOU for the fun day, and to Suz for inviting me to play!

And thank you for your congrats, too.

To ALL the finalists in both divisions of the Daphne, huge hugs and CONGRATULATIONS! Weather permitting, I'll dance on the beach for all of us tomorrow!


Llehn said...

I heard this vampire joke the other day and thought it was pretty funny.

Q: What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A: It's a pain in the neck.


OK. You had to be there.

Anna Campbell said...

Llehn, I think you had to be there and drinking beer? Yes? LOL!

Hey, 99 comments. Let's make this 100! There's our challenge for today!

PinkPeony said...

Congrats on finaling, Nancy!

I never realized the green M&M was a girl M&M...but I also heard that the green ones were supposed to make you *orny.

Anne Kane said...

Loved the weird questions! Just got home from work, so much appreciated. I've always wondered abut those weather guys as well. LOL

No great insights here, but glad I dropped by.

Nancy said...

Llehn, that is the perfect joke for Jo-Jo! Especially as his career progresses, I can hear him pause and have the audience fill in the punch line.

Y'all have come up with some killer jokes!

Anna, thanks for making it 100 comments!

PinkPeony, thank you for your congrats on the Daphne final! I can hardly wait to find out who else is on the list so I can start sending my congratulations notes to them!

Anne, thank you for coming by! Put your feet up and relax a while!


Tawny said...

Q: What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A: It's a pain in the neck.
ROFLMAO -thats so bad its good *g*

ElaineCharton said...

Love the cover! This is on my TBB list. Good luck with it!

As for the missing socks. My mother gave me that answer many years ago. There is a sock monster in the washer and dryer. He steals one sock and by they time you replace it he's tired of playing and gives it back.
He lives in that alternate universe where things like missing bills and insurance claim forms and missing homework go. :)

Nancy said...

Elaine, hi! How wonderful to see you!

Homework sucked into an alternate universe? LOL, Elaine! That may be the one excuse my kids never pulled.

Thanks so much for coming by for a laugh! Happy TGIF!


ElaineCharton said...

I use that excuse in my Rent Paying Job. Doctors offices will call and ask when the bill will be paid. If it's not in my computer yet I tell them it landed in the same universe the sock monster lives in. Gives them a laugh and diffuses a tense phone call. :)

Suzanne Welsh said...

Nancy, congrats on the Daphne final!!

wfacindy said...

Nancy, Yeehaw on La Vida Vampire making the finals in the cover contest!

Nancy said...

Elaine, what a terrific way to diffuse a tense situation!

Suz and Cindy, thanks so much for your good wishes on the contest!

My time is up, but I again thank Suz and all the members of the Bandits band. It's always and honor to be with you, and always fun!

I will check in tomorrow to respond to any more comments. Meantime, happy TGIF and weekend, all, and the happiest of writing and reading!!


Jessica said...

Such a great post, Nancy! And so clever - though I am not surprised. I wish I had some fun food for thought to contribute . . . I at least enjoyed reading everyone else's posts!

Nancy said...

Hi Jessica! Thank you for coming by just to say hello! Hope you have a terrific weekend!