Stuff Happened

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

I'd planned to have this post be the Launch Party for my self-published novelette, The Sidhe Princess, but you know what they say about the best laid plans:

STUFF HAPPENS!

I'm sorry to say that STUFF did happen, and I missed my deadline. In this case some of the STUFF included a sojourn to the Big Easy and other destinations south of there across the Gulf of Mexico. But all along the way, Aunty had the Lair and it's inhabitants firmly in mind.

Aunty made several stops on her journey, the first being the Central American nation of Belize, where the DH and I investigated the Mayan ruins at Altun Ha.

Never fear, Aunty was assured by her guides Ed and Tracy that the world really is not going to end in December, 2012 as some claim. That's just as far as the Mayans bothered to calculate their calendar! Sounds like a perfectly reasonable explanation to me, considering the ruins at Altun Ha date back a couple of centuries BC. Aunty doesn't feel the need to calculate HER calendar nor even the Lair's for more than the next 23 centuries.

A bit further south, Aunty found herself on the island of Roatan, which belongs to the country of Honduras. This long, narrow island was once the stronghold of pirates, but Aunty didn't see any scalawags she recognized (Ho! Romance Writers Revengers, where were you?) However, this scurvy knave claimed to be kin to our Golden Rooster.

As you can see, Aunty severely questioned the validity of his claim!

Also on Roatan, Aunty's lovely taxi driver, Mario showed her around his hometown of Coxon Bay. He even stopped at the local grocery store and helped Aunty procure an ice cold Diet Pepsi, the perfect pick-me-up on a hot and humid day!

Aunty thinks it's high time we recruited a Honduran cabana boy for the Lair. What do you think?

Back on the ship, Aunty headed for her last port of call in Cozumel, Mexico. But not before she finally located her missing reading glasses in a most unusual place...

And got a great idea for a whole new kind of shape-shifter story!

Back in our home port of New Orleans, Aunty made a quick stop at Cafe Du Monde to sample beignets and pick up a few recipes for Sven. Somehow, I doubt he will serve beignets on a regular basis considering the trails of powdered sugar they leave behind, but perhaps on special occasions...

So now you know Aunty's excuses for missing her deadline and NOT having her novelette up for sale in September as expected. But I promise we will have a SUPER LAUNCH PARTY for Sidhe Princess very soon!

Meanwhile, what do you think:

Is that Pirate Parrot related to the GR?

Should we recruit Mario as the Lair's newest cabana boy?

And would you read a paranormal romance in which the hero or heroine shape-shifted into a manta ray?

Shake, Rattle, and Aloha -- An Earthquake Tale

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

When an earthquake rattled the East Coast this week, it made me think about my own experiences with having "the earth move." The DH and I are native Californians who have never lived anywhere but the Golden State. Given California's reputation with regard to earthquakes, the two of us have lots of stories to tell about quakes, right?

Wrong.

DH has never been in a major earthquake, and the only one I was ever in happened when I was six-months-old (which hardly counts). In fact, these two old Californians had to go all the way to Hawaii to experience an earthquake first hand!

We are very lucky because we live where it is easy to find inexpensive deals to Hawaii. Such was the case one recent October when a travel agency we've often used offered a five day trip to Honolulu, and we decided to go for it. Our high rise hotel was in a GREAT location, across the street from the Honolulu Zoo and half a block from the beach. The views from our ninth story room were wonderful -- we could see all the way to Diamond Head.

Sunday morning at 7 a.m. I was awakened from a sound sleep by the bed shaking. Thinking the DH had returned from his morning swim and was playing a game of 'let's wake up the slug', I rolled over ready to yell at him but NO DH. Instead, I heard a very loud roar, while the bed and the room both started to sway!

I may have never been in an earthquake before but I KNEW what was happening. I threw some clothes on over my pajamas while the room continued to sway. Then I grabbed my umbrella (Did I mention it was pouring rain?) and RAN down all nine flights of stairs to the lobby!

I had a friend who was trapped in an elevator for four hours during the Loma Prieta quake in 1989 so there was NO WAY I was getting in an elevator, though that stairwell was pretty icky. I'm just glad we weren't on the eighteenth floor.

When I reached the lobby, huffing and puffing like a steam locomotive, I saw a lot of bleary-eyed people milling about. An emergency generator was already set up to run one elevator and some lights. Staff also had turned on a battery powered radio and I listened anxiously for about ten minutes for news of death, destruction, and... a tsunami!

All I heard was that one power grid had gone down and in doing so, had triggered overloads on all the power grids so electricity was out all over the island. Also, that the quake had been centered off the Big Island, not Oahu. And NO tsunami.

I couldn't quite believe that last part, and worse -- DH was still out there SWIMMING IN THE OCEAN! I walked out to the front sidewalk and peered through the sheets of rain. Finally, I decided if he didn't show up in five more minutes, I'd go looking for him. Two minutes later he walked up, towel around his shoulders, dripping wet. He headed straight for the elevator and couldn't understand why all those people were standing around in the lobby. When I mentioned THE EARTHQUAKE, he gave me a blank stare.

He hadn't felt a thing!

Luckily the only consequence of the earthquake turned out to be no power in Honolulu for thirteen hours. Inconvenient, yes. No cooked food, no air conditioning, no running water above the third floor... But in the grand scheme of things, it wasn't that bad! We spent most of the day sitting on the lanai of the Hawaiian Princess hotel, which was right on the beach and had a lovely breeze.

I give the highest kudos to the Honolulu police, who were out directing traffic within 30 minutes of the quake knocking out the power. Officers were stationed at every traffic light down the length of Waikiki, and they stayed until the power came back on at 8 P.M. As the electricity was restored to each high rise hotel along Waikiki, a cheer went up from the patrons inside. Ours was no exception.

By the time we flew home on Tuesday morning, everything on Oahu (the airport, the roadways, the tourist attractions) was running as smoothly as it had been before the quake hit.

So there you have my earthquake tale, now it's your turn: Did you feel the quake this week? Have you been in another earthquake? If not, do you have a 'wild weather' experience you can share?

Joining The Crowd...

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

Lately it seems that anytime two or more writers get together and talk about writing, the subjects of ebooks and indie publishing come up. With the sudden increase in e-readers and the subsequent demand for ebooks, self-publishing has lost most of its negative stigma and is now seen as a good way for writers to give readers more of what they want -- MORE STORIES!

After over a year of having doors constantly slammed in my face, the option of taking my stories directly to my readers has grown very darn appealing! A few of my writer-friends have been wildly successful with putting their stories directly onto Amazon and other ebook venues (by wildly successful, I mean earning six figures or close to it). Many others are achieving more moderate sales, but still better or equal to the money they've earned with traditional publishing (moderate sounds GREAT to me!).

Encouraged by these stories of success (including a couple of my Bandita-sisters), and by requests for more from my readers (truly music to my ears), I've decided to dip my toes into the big scary ocean of indie publishing.

Scary because the responsibility for everything now falls on lil ole me. The cover, the formatting, the editing, the promotion -- I get to do it all. ACK!

But everyone who has spent more than five minutes in the Lair knows that I'm not one to back down from a challenge. After all, SOMEONE must discipline all those cabana boys. But I digress...

Several months I started writing a story that was kind of a prequel to my first book, The Wild Sight. I say kind of because the main character is actually The Wild Sight hero's mother when she was a teen. I posted excerpts of this story as a special bonus for my newsletter group (and yes, you can join the group, just go here: http://yhoo.it/quNm8x ). So I've decided to make this story -- actually a novelette (between 7,500 and 17,499 words) my first foray into the big, scary ocean of indie publishing.

I'm still working on the editing phase, but here's the gorgeous cover I had designed by the lovely and talented Kim Van Meter (http://bit.ly/pbVV45)! And here is the blurb I've concocted:

In the rural Northern Ireland of the 1960s, sixteen-year-old Moira Mullins is newly released from her second stay in a mental institution. Her problem is that she can't seem to escape the notice of the other-wordly inhabitants of the wild lands bordering her family's farm. Creatures nobody else can see or hear.

When one of these beings, a fairy princess called the Maid of Ulster, offers to foretell the future, Moira jumps at the chance. But the Maid has ulterior motives that could have tragic results for Moira, who learns the future is sometimes better unknown.

I plan to have the novelette available on Amazon next month. Please wish me luck as the big, scary Indie ocean washes around my ankles!

Now for a few questions for my dear Bandita Buddies: Does the publisher of a book influence your buying? After the cover and the blurb, what do you notice next about a book? Have you read a good indie published book lately? Please share the details with Aunty!

Summertime and the Living Is (Not) Easy!

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

We've reached the end of another GREAT month in the Lair and I'm thrilled to send July out with a BANG (or is that boom?) by welcoming my good friend and Lair favorite Marie Force back for a visit. The third book in Marie's "Fatal" series, Fatal Consequences, was released this month, along with a lot of other stuff. But I'll let Marie tell you all about it:

Greetings to the Banditas! Thank you SO much to my dear friend Aunty Cindy and the gang for having me back again to celebrate the release of my new book, Fatal Consequences. This is book 3 in my Fatal Series, which pairs D.C. homicide detective Lt. Sam Holland with U.S. Senator Nick Cappuano. The Fatal books mix romance with politics and mystery, and book 3 has plenty of all three. Here’s a brief bit about the book:

The murder of two members of the Capitol Cleaning Service might’ve been just another homicide investigation—that is if one of them hadn’t been romantically involved with a married senator from Arizona. Lt. Sam Holland and her team are plunged into another complex case that at first seems open and shut. But as Sam tugs on the threads of the investigation she uncovers a deep, dark Washington secret that threatens the careers of some of the government’s highest-ranking officials. Racing to catch a killer before he can strike again, Sam and her fiancé, U.S. Senator Nick Cappuano, attempt to plan a wedding while her colleague Detective Tommy “Gonzo” Gonzales faces life-changing news.

It’s fitting that I should end what has been one of the most insane months of my life with my friends at the Romance Bandits. I definitely need to celebrate that July 2011 is coming to an end. Let me give you the rundown… keeping in mind that Fatal book 4, Fatal Flaw, was due yesterday.

July began with the final day of the Romance Writers of America conference in New York City. Fatal Flaw was about half done at this point, and not going well for reasons to be discussed later. After sprinting home to spend the Fourth of July holiday with my family, I had to re-pack for a six-day trip to Atlanta for my day job’s annual meeting. Not a word got written on Flaw while my daughter and I were in Atlanta.

Returning home, we celebrated her 16^th birthday and the launch of Fatal Consequences, both on the 18^th. That same day, she started driver’s ed from 6 a.m. to 9 a.m. for ten straight weekdays. Oh the joy of hauling a sixteen-year-old out of bed at 5:20 a.m., in the summer, for driver’s ed. Around that same time, she got her first real job, working as a hostess in a five-star restaurant in downtown Newport, RI, which is about thirty minutes from where we live. And did I mention my son, soon-to-be 13, is attending sailing camp, also in downtown Newport, but during the day. One kid to Newport in the morning, the other kid to Newport in the afternoon and an 11 p.m. pickup for the working girl. My husband helps, but since I work from home, most of it falls on me.

Did I mention that we are gearing up at work to move our company’s website to a new platform? To save some money, we decided to hand move all 800 pages and 10,000 linked files and images ourselves. And that started this week , the same week my book is due and the same week the quarterly magazine I edit for work is on deadline. Calgon, where are you when I need you? Thankfully, (and I never thought I’d say this), our designer is running late on the magazine, and it got bumped to next week. There is a God.

Back to Fatal Flaw, which hung over my head like a shiny, sharp guillotine this entire month. I finished it at 9 p.m. on July 29, the day before it was due. I wrote 18,000 words in three days, and my hands feel like they’re 80 and arthritic. Thankfully, I have three faithful beta readers who were critiquing as I went, which is how we managed to discover. . .wait for it. . . a fatal flaw in the story.

This is my 19^th book, so I have somewhat of a routine by now, but nothing was working, and I didn’t have the luxury of time to blame it on the stress and chaos of my life. The writing was like pulling teeth, and I couldn’t figure out why. Then, when I was 70,000 words into the book, my betas helped me identify a major problem (aka the fatal flaw) in the story. Once I fixed that by writing five new opening chapters—something I have never done before—the writing flowed the way it normally does, giving me an ‘ah-ha’ moment: If the writing is like pulling teeth, something is wrong. Figure out what’s wrong and fix it. My editor and I have chatted about watching out what we name future books so as not to bring the bad karma to the writing.

To say I am THRILLED that July 2011 is behind me is putting it mildly. I plan to spend August working on that website migration at work and in my free time, catching up on my TBR, lolling about on the beach and my dad’s boat, hanging with my kids and having a bunch of family and friends visit. I am sooooo ready for a break from the pressure cooker. Later in August, I plan to get to work on my fourth McCarthy book and hopefully a Christmas novella for that series. In addition, I have four other books I am preparing for publication, starting later this year: Georgia on My Mind as well as my beloved Treading Water trilogy: Treading Water, Marking Time and Starting Over, so be on the lookout for all of them soon!

Summertime and the living is easy—or not. Which is it for you? Thanks for coming by and helping me to celebrate the end of the month from hell! I’ll give a copy of Fatal Consequences to one commenter today.

Keep an eye out for the Sept. 5 launch of the FREE Fatal wedding novella, Fatal Destiny, in which Sam and Nick tie the knot. Until then, I’ll be at the beach!

Enjoy the beach, Marie! Sounds like you could use a rest!

Marie Force is the bestselling, award-winning author of the Fatal Series from Harlequin’s Carina Press. The series includes FATAL AFFAIR, FATAL JUSTICE, FATAL CONSEQUENCES and FATAL DESTINY, which is out Sept. 5. FATAL FLAW is coming in February 2012.

Earlier this year, Marie published her popular, bestselling McCarthys of Gansett Island Series: MAID FOR LOVE, FOOL FOR LOVE and READY FOR LOVE, with more books coming soon in the series. Find out more about Marie and her books at her website: www.mariesullivanforce.com, on her blog at http://mariesullivanforce.blogspot.com, where she runs the weekly Romance & Oreos Book Club, on Facebook at www.facebook.com/pages/Marie-Force/248130827909, and on Twitter @marieforce.

The Watcher Is Coming SOON!

by Aunty Cindy and Jo-Mama


AC: Hey Banditas and BBs! Did you notice the new covers on the sidebar under August releases? Did you also notice a name you haven't seen on a book cover until now? YES! Our very own Jo-Mama will have her debut release next month -- a scary, can't-put-down tale of romantic
suspense called THE WATCHER.

J-M: Aunty Cindy, this is a real squeeeeeee moment for me! Holding a proof copy of my book in my hands was beyond thrilling.

AC: I gotta agree! Seeing the uncorrected Advance Review Copy of your book ranks right up there in the Thrill of a Lifetime category!

As most of the Lair regulars know, we Banditas first met because we were all Golden Heart finalists in 2006. Jeanne, Cassondra, Suz, Jo and I were all finalists in the romantic suspense category. But Jo was THE BIG WINNER that night, and the book was THE WATCHER! Now, at long last, we all get a chance to read this award winning story. I've read it and I have to tell you it kept me up most of the night! THE WATCHER is a spooky tale of a serial killer and the people in law enforcement working to catch him.

J-M: Thanks, Cindy! That's a fine compliment for a suspense writer. But, not to worry, Bandita Buddies, there's plenty of romance in the story, too, as my hero and heroine work together to track down the killer.

AC: Jo, please tell us where you got the idea for this book and how you came up with such unique and fascinating characters.

J-M: The idea for my killer came from an abnormal psychology class I was taking at the time. I can't reveal too much about the killer's pathology or I'll give a key point away, but I thought, "If a person with this particular condition were to experience these particular traumas as he grew up, what might be the result?" I sort of ran with that idea and came up with my bad guy.

I wanted my hero to be a steady, dependable sort of guy, who ended up as deputy sheriff in this small town to escape a heart-breaking event in his past.

Kate Myers, my heroine, is a plunge-into-the-thick-of-things-without-thinking kind of woman. She's been tracking this killer for a long time.

AC: Ah yes, your hero Ben Slater is definitely DROOL worthy! I'm sure everyone who reads this book will adore him. Was there anyone you used as a "model" for this character?

J-M: I didn't have a real person in mind for Slater's physical attributes, but I definitely relied on the men in my life -- my four sons and husband -- as a template for his personality. My guys are very protective kinds of men.

The operative word for Slater is "steady."

After I'd long finished the book, however, I realized that he looks very much like Alcide in HBO's "True Blood." Here's a picture if you don't follow the series.

AC: Oh my! (fans self vigorously) I really must put this series in my Netflix queue!

Now, where was I? Oh, right! Your heroine, Kate is very much his match! She is also a forensic psychiatrist. How did you come up with her occupation? Anyone who served as her "model?"

J-M: Kate is tall and leggy, very California "fresh" and healthy looking. I wanted her to be smart and an expert in her profession. By the way, forensic psychiatry is a real career, a sub-speciality of psychiatry and often an adjunct to law and criminality. I may have taken a little literary license with the kinds of things my heroine can do, however!

AC: That's why it's called 'fiction' m'dear! And why we love reading and writing it! I can't wait for THE WATCHER to hit the shelves (and e-book readers) because I want to talk about some of the interesting plot twists without spoiling the story for others.

J-M: Thanks for hosting me, Cindy, and giving up your blog day to talk about my book!

AC: My pleasure! I love to be the first one to interview you about your debut release.

Okay, everyone, I hope we have you intrigued enough to read Jo's book.

Don't miss our July 30 Launch Party for THE WATCHER here in the Lair!

What unusual occupations have you read about lately? Are there some different forms of employment you would like to see a hero or heroine of a book doing?

What was the last book you read that kept you awake at least half the night?

Also, send your snail mail addy to Jo at jo.lewisrobertson@yahoo.com to receive a free postcard of her book's cover and be entered in a contest to receive a print copy of THE WATCHER when it releases.

All Covered Up!

Aunty is beaming with pride to welcome back her good writer-buddy and Lair favorite Kendra Leigh Castle, who is celebrating the release of her newest book Dark Awakening.

As you probably know, Kendra Leigh Castle writes dark paranormal romance and lives in southern Maryland with her husband, three kids, and a menagerie of pets. Find her online at her website: www.kendraleighcastle.com

Thanks to the incomparable Aunty Cindy for inviting me back to the Lair! In gratitude, I have brought with me a hunk to share. Chocolate covered... my favorite!

So today I wanted to talk about (surprise!) the visual aspect of what makes us pick up a romance novel. I've just returned from RWA 11 in New York City, where I not only had an amazing time and got to sign my new release Dark Awakening, but I also somehow accumulated a duffel bag full of shiny new books even though I promised myself I'd behave on that count this year. Truth is, though, I'm a sucker for a good cover. And if that good cover, along with its story, comes for the price of free, it is finding a spot in my luggage. I'm a cover ho! I'm not ashamed.

At the Grand Central Spotlight, a Q&A where editors and publicists for that house discuss what they do for their books, there was some talk about the importance of the cover. You've got just a few seconds to catch a potential reader's eye so the art department has a HUGE task.

We've all felt the impact of a fabulous cover. And I'd guess we've all walked on by what might be a great book because the cover just didn't do it for us. I got a big kick out of watching readers wandering the Grand Central signing, of which I was proud to be a part this year, and scan the tables. They'd look, look... and then the eyes would dart back. The expression in the eyes was unmistakable, "Ooh. Pretty." I caught a fair number of people with this:

Now, I'm biased but my cover really works for me. Dark atmospherics, check. Cool font, check. Pettable abs framed by a leather coat, check. To me it all says, "This book has a hot, brooding supernatural man in it who totally gets naked at some point and YOU WILL LOVE IT! NOM! NOM! NOM!" But, uh, you know, that's just me. *AHEM* (Note from Aunty: actually, that was EXACTLY what I was thinking!)

Now, it doesn't always have to be a guy on the cover. This is a release coming in the spring, no guy to be seen and even if I hadn't read a most excellent excerpt I'd be dying to grab it. Check this out:

I love the fire and the kickass chick in a dress. It's got the "Ooh pretty" factor in spades. I notice I head for a lot of the female-centric covers, actually. For one thing, I know they're likely to be urban fantasy, which I've suddenly gotten into, but also, the image of a gorgeous, empowered woman who looks ready to take on the world is something that appeals to me. Take, for instance, the cover of Nalini Singh's Guild Hunters series: gorgeous heroine with weapons AND wings? Yes, please! I think maybe this is because we know, as the reader, that we'll be seeing the world through this heroine's eyes. We obviously want her to be as amazing as possible, since for the duration of the story, in some sense, we are her.

So what draws you to a cover? For me, it is less the gender of the person on the cover than the general feel. I want dark, lush, sensual for both paranormal and erotic paranormal. If it's an urban fantasy, I want warrior hawtness. I want the atmosphere of the book in a single mouth-watering shot. Which is why I'm pretty excited about the cover for my January release, Midnight Reckoning. I know, I know, shameless plug, but seriously:

So let's talk covers! What do you look for? Do you have a recent favorite? What makes you stop and grab a book?

I've got a signed copy of Dark Awakening for one commenter who I'll select at random. Aunty will announce the winner tomorrow, so be sure to check back!

The OTHER Men in My Life

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

Yes, we all have them. In addition to friends, family, and significant others, we all have other important relationships in our lives. I'm talking about relationships with certain professionals... AHEM! Like your doctor, your plumber, or your mechanic! If you are very lucky, you find excellent people in these important professions and develop long-term relationships with these individuals.

I feel fortunate to have developed three such long-term relationships. One of them has been going on even longer than my relationship with the DH! Oh, and all three of them happen to be men. They are my dentist, my hairdresser, and my mechanic. They are the "other men" in my life and I couldn't get by without them.

Until a couple of years ago, my longest relationship with any man was with my dentist. I know, I know, everyone HATES going to the dentist, but that's because they didn't go to Ben. I don't exactly remember how I happened to start going to Ben's office. I think it was because he was in the same office complex as my son's orthodontist. Yes, it was THAT long ago... the mid 1980s.

Ben was a few years older than me, his middle daughter was the same age as my son, and his wife worked with him part-time as a hygienist. Ben and his office staff were friendly and did their jobs very well. I actually didn't mind going to the dentist because it was almost like going to see family members. They were always happy to see me and usually in good moods. Then, a couple of years ago, Ben did the unthinkable -- he retired and sold his practice! ACK!!! Yes, I even got invited to his retirement party because I'd been his patient for sooo long (my file was so old and thick that it was held together with duct tape). But I told him I was never going to forgive him for retiring on me! Never mind that *I* had retired from my day job first...

Now I go to the dentist who bought Ben's practice. I call him "Baby Dentist" because he is younger than my son. In fact he and ALL his staff look like they are fresh out of high school! Don't get me wrong, he is an excellent dentist and his staff are all quite nice, they just make me feel SO OLD!

My second oldest lasting relationship started in 1988 -- the year before I met my DH. My new BFF recommended I try her hairdresser. I did, and I've gone to Guy ever since! When we first met he was young, single and a big party-boy. I followed him to three different salons, through his marriage and the birth of his two kids, and a few years ago, his venture into opening his own business. He has been an enthusiastic beta-reader for all my manuscripts. Last year I helped him celebrate his son's acceptance to UCLA on a full athletic scholarship. Two weeks ago, we celebrated his daughter's graduation from high school.

Guy knows where more than a few of my skeletons are hidden and I know the same about him. Thank goodness he's a few years younger than me because after all this time I can't imagine anyone else cutting my hair! If he ever retires, I'll probably just start shaving my head.

I was actually introduced to the last "other man" in my life by my DH. No, this is not as kinky as it sounds! It was 1990 and I was filled with frustration over taking my car to the dealership to have it worked on. They were slow, I didn't trust them, and their 'customer service' was non-existent. The DH said, "Take it to my mechanic, Dwayne." So I did, and it was the start of a wonderful relationship!

Dwayne is as honest as the day is long. He will tell you how long something will take, how much it is going to cost, and he usually finishes earlier and cheaper. He will also tell you if something is not worth fixing (this happened more than once with my son's old clunkers). Also more than once, I've showed up at Dwayne's shop with my car on the tow truck's hook, five minutes before he was due to go home, and he stayed open, not just to get the car inside, but also to wait for the DH or my son to come pick me up! A true gentleman, he would never leave a lady stranded in an industrial strip mall, which is where his shop is located.

Dwayne is a few years older than me, and I live in fear that he will retire and leave me in the lurch! However, he is also one of those guys who is only happy when he is elbow deep under the hood of a car. To my knowledge, he has never taken a vacation. If he ever does retire, I may have to start using regional transit!

So now you know my secret... I have three OTHER men in my life who are all essential! I've known them all for decades and truly appreciate not only their professional expertise but their friendship.

Do you have some long-term relationships in your life, besides your family members or spouse? Please share who they are, what they do, and how you met them.

The Day I Became A Celebrity

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

The iconoclastic artist Andy Warhol was once quoted as saying, "In the future, everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes."

Well, I got part of my fifteen minutes, if not exactly fame then a taste of what it is like to be a celebrity. It happened in Thailand, an amazing and beautiful country with some of the nicest people in the world.

DH and I were doing a 'self tour' of the Summer Palace which is a short boat ride up the river from Bangkok. The palace is actually about a dozen different buildings on extensive, beautifully landscaped grounds. I was walking by myself across a pretty little stone bridge over an ornamental pond, when I heard a huge group of school children approaching. There must have been a couple hundred of them, around ten years old and wearing crisp blue and white uniforms. Undoubtedly they were on a field trip.

I scooted out of the way, and stood with my back against the low stone railing of the bridge to let the big noisy group pass. As the first dozen kids walked by me, they all stared (I was probably one of the first if not THE first American they'd ever seen live and in person). Then, one bold youngster shouted out, "Hello!" To which I answered, "Hello!" This brought a gale of nervous giggles, followed by a raucous chorus of hellos.

After a few dozen more kids, all chirping out "hello" like myna birds, scurried past me, one little boy got brave and stuck out his hand while exclaiming, "hello." I obligingly shook his hand and said hello back. Well, that opened the flood gates! Next thing I knew, about a hundred enthusiastic kids were crowded around me, all shouting hello and grabbing for my hands.

YIKES! It was more than a bit scary!

All those eager little bodies pressing around me could have easily sent me over the railing and into the pond. Dozens of them might have fallen with me! Fortunately that didn't happen. I kept smiling, shouting hello, and grabbing as many outstretched hands as I could, while the teachers herded the kids the rest of the way across the bridge. They also smiled and bobbed their heads in thanks to me.

The whole incident lasted maybe ten minutes, but it felt like a lot longer at the time. When I got back to the DH, I collapsed onto the shady bench beside him and said, "Now I know how Michael Jackson feels."

And I can just imagine the discussions in the school yard days later. While one kid brags about his adventure, another kid whines, "No fair! We didn't get to shake hands with an American tourist at the Summer Palace!"

Have you had your fifteen minutes of fame? Maybe five minutes? Please share your exploits as a celebrity with Aunty and the rest of us here in the Lair!

Close Encounters of the Reptilian Kind

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

Trish's book launch and the talk about National parks reminded me of my first trip to the Everglades, and the first time I ever saw an alligator "in the wild" -- as in not inside a zoo or other compound.

This did not happen on our first trip to Florida. We'd already been there several times. First we did the Disney World/Epcot experience, then we did Speed Week. Heck, we'd even ventured down to the Keys a few weeks after a hurricane devastated the surrounding area. But this was the first time we ever ventured into the Everglades.

It was a wild and blustery winter day in south Florida (but still a LOT warmer than here in NorCal!) when we pulled into the ranger's station intent on taking one of those swamp buggy tours into the Everglades. Unfortunately, the weather made it unsafe for swamp buggies or anything else out in the 'Glades, the ranger politely explained. Road closed. End of line. But seeing how crest-fallen we were, she directed us to a nearby spot where we would probably see some alligators.

We followed her directions and within minutes found ourselves driving slowly along an elevated gravel road with water on both sides. The vegetation was lush and there were birds galore. Suddenly, DH threw the car into reverse and backed up about 100 yards, then inched forward a bit, saying, "I think I see a gator!"

He rolled down the window and pointed. I couldn't see anything, so he shut off the car and we both got out and walked to the back bumper. What is it about reptiles, especially large reptiles, that brings out the stupid in mammal brains? The DH pointed again and I squinted a little more, until I noticed the partially submerged black log he indicated actually had AN EYEBALL!

Oh WOW! An honest to goodness gator! This was exciting.

We stood for several minutes just looking, and the gator just stayed there too, never moving. Then DH got the bright idea to "feed" it to see if it would move. He opened the trunk and pulled out a fat-free muffin left over from breakfast (they hadn't been very tasty, but we didn't throw them out in case we were desperate for a snack), and lobbed it in the gator's direction.

ACK!!! In about one-tenth of a nanosecond, the thing whipped around and these massive jaws went SNAP!

As my eyes bugged out and my throat made this funny little EEP sound, my brain shouted, "That thing is FAST! And it's A LOT BIGGER than it first looked!" Well over six feet!

But mostly I'm thinking, "RUN YOU IDIOT! DON'T JUST STAND HERE!"

Apparently DH read my thoughts, or he was thinking the same thing. But he managed to tell me, "Do not run! Slowly get in the car." Yeah, right! We both shuffled carefully and quietly around and got into the car. Gravel flew as we high-tailed it outta there!

We've been back to Florida many times, and have been into the Everglades more than once. AWESOME PLACE! We've even been on a couple of swamp buggy tours. But we have NEVER again been stupid enough to try and feed the gators!

Are you like Aunty and Indiana Jones, do reptiles make you break into a cold sweat? Or do you like our reptilian inhabitants? Do you have any encounters with reptiles you can share with us?

Going Ape On Gibraltar

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

Not long ago, I watched an excellent travel program all about the Camino Santiago Pilgrimage in Spain. The show brought back memories of my trip to Spain and Portugal and one of the funniest moments of my travel adventures.

We'd been in Spain and Portugal for ten days. We had prepared ourselves for the cold wet weather, it was February after all. But we had not expected the lack of heat and hot water in several of the pensiones where we'd stayed. The morning we rolled up to the border crossing to enter Gibraltar, I was cold, hungry and homesick.

When the guard in the crossing booth asked for our passports in his precise English accent, I almost jumped out of the car and kissed him. Then we drove a few hundred yards down the road and on my right I saw a Safeway grocery store and knew I was in Heaven!

After we hung out in the quaint downtown for awhile, we got on the tram to take us to the lofty heights of The Rock. The views were truly spectacular and we were awed by the formations inside the limestone caves. Since it was a beautiful clear day, we opted to walk part of the way back down and found ourselves at the only other tram stop on the mountainside. This spot was also the favorite hang-out for a large group of the famous Gibraltar apes, which are rather large tailless monkeys. And the males have quite impressive teeth.

While waiting for the tram to arrive we watched some of the moms with their babies and a few larger youngsters playing along the stone wall designed to keep us humans on the path. I took a couple more pictures of the harbor, and the apes. In spite of signs in several languages warning NOT to feed or tease the apes, some people waiting with us started offering them cookies. Meanwhile, DH took the camera and directed me to stand over near the wall so he could get some shots of me with the apes in the background. Only they didn't STAY in the background.

As I stood smiling and oblivious, a half-grown "teen" ape made a big leap toward my shoulder. I saw him just as he made contact. I screamed, jumped and pushed him away. I think he may have yelped too as he bounced onto the pavement, then leaped back over the wall. The DH was doubled over laughing, and yes, he got one picture but it was blurry because both the ape and I were moving QUICKLY! VERY QUICKLY! DH still claims that the fastest he's ever seen me move.

Fortunately, the tram arrived a couple of minutes later. Once we were safely back within the confines of Safeway and I'd consumed a Cadbury chocolate bar, I was able to laugh about my misadventure with a young, and maybe amorous (or at least hungry) ape.

I realize not everyone can have an elephant follow them home from school like our Helen, but have you ever had an up-close and personal encounter with wild life? A rabid squirrel or prairie dog perhaps? Please share the details with Aunty and the rest of the Lair.

Arches and I Don't Mean Golden

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

A few months ago, the DH and I took a little jaunt to celebrate our anniversary. This time around we stayed pretty close to home, only a few states away. We went to Arches National Park near Moab, Utah and close to the Utah/Colorado border.

As anyone who knows Aunty will attest, she is NOT an outdoorsy type. But the sights at Arches were just too spectacular to view strictly from the car window. Within an hour of our arrival in the park, I actually found myself doing something I literally had not done in years --HIKING! But there was just no other way to see these fabulous rock formations, which are unlike anything I've ever seen anywhere else.

Here are a few of my piccies so you can see what I mean:

The Windows

One of the most famous formations in Arches National Park. Individually they are the South Window (on the left in this picture) and the North Window. They, and all the other fantastic rock formations in the park are the result of wind and water erosion over hundreds of thousands of years.

To put the size of the Windows into perspective, here's the DH (all 6 feet 5 inches or 1.97 meters of him) standing in the middle of the South Window.

I'm standing about 100 yards down the hill so that I can fit the whole thing in. And yes, it was a stunning day, as evidenced by the clouds and blue sky behind the South Window.

Delicate Arch

Probably the most photographed and therefore the most famous of all the formations in Arches is this one. Also called "Bloomers" or "Cowboy Chaps" for obvious reasons. I viewed it from a very long distance and let the DH hike the extremely steep three mile trail for a closer look.

Delicate Arch stands 52 feet (or 16 meters) tall, and sits all by itself on the edge of a rocky plateau in the absolute middle of nowhere. This photo does not do the bright red and orange coloring of the arch justice. It is absolutely striking (even through binoculars down in the parking lot)!

Landscape Arch

This is the longest arch in the park, and I'll have to take DH's word that this is it. Once again, I stayed behind and read a book while he make the arduous hike through the Devil's Garden to view this arch and the other formations. It does look like the other pictures I've seen of it, so I guess I can trust his word that this is the genuine article.

One of the rangers told us that ten or fifteen years ago, a piece of rock cracked and fell from the center of Landscape Arch. Luckily it happened at a time when very few tourists were around and nobody was hurt!

The Three Gossips

Finally, a formation that is not an arch. The guide book described these gigantic pillars that look like over-sized human figures as the Three Gossips. I personally thought they resembled the Three Wise Men of New Testament fame. Or perhaps three ancient Egyptian dieties.

The park is full of pillar type formations. Some of them were undoubtedly arches whose middles collapsed. Other formations look like giant ships or castles. I won't bore you with any more of my less-than stellar photos. If you check Google Images, you'll see many fabulous ones.

Better yet, take a trip to Arches National Park yourself. Aunty guarantees you won't regret it!

When you travel, what is your favorite destination? City or great outdoors? Foreign or domestic? Same place different day or some place entirely new?

MORE Booty!

Sorry to be a bit tardy with naming my winner from the 18th but--

DRUM ROLL PLEASE!

Congrats to JANGA!!

You are the winner of the lip gloss and the Go Red pin!

Please send your snail mail address to Aunty at our Romance Bandits email:
romancebandits AT gmail DOT com

A Very Bad Place To Start

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

Tomorrow (the 19th) my fabulous critique partner Jo-Mama and I are giving a presentation to our local Romance Writers of America chapter. We were asked, along with another chapter member, to talk about contests and critique groups.

I am concentrating on contests for my portion of the panel, specifically contests for unpublished writers. One of my topics covers things in contest entries that drive judges BONKERS. But as I was going over my speaking notes, it occurred to me that this could just as easily be things in books that drive readers BONKERS.

Editors and agents aren't the only ones who make decisions on books after reading a page or two. I can usually tell right off if I'm going to like a story, and I know I'm not the only person who stands in the aisle of the bookstore reading the opening page.

It is so true that an author must hook the reader on page one. There better be something compelling, fresh, or different on that very first page for me to keep reading page two. I don't know about you, but lately, I've run across waaay too many stories whose beginnings leave me scratching my head or yawning. I've seen or read these openings too many times before, and I'll bet you have as well:

• A big fight is going on or a huge chase, but I (the reader) have no idea why or who these characters are, nor do I care.
• The heroine (or hero) looks in the mirror or out the window and contemplates her past and/or future.
• The heroine (or hero but again usually it's a female) is late for work or an important function.
• The heroine hates her job (usually justifiably), has just been fired or is about to get fired.

I'm not saying I won't read a book with one of these openings. Matter of fact, I have read GREAT books with all of these beginnings. But I've seen each of these scenarios so many times that the author better have a very unique twist for me to keep reading a story that opens with a such a cliche.

What about you? Is there a particular opening scene you've seen too often lately? Have you read a good book with one of Aunty's openings and it totally worked for you? What are some other things in books that drive you BONKERS?

In keeping with our Go Red celebration, Aunty is giving away a red box of six pretty lip glosses from Ulta and an AHA pin to one lucky commenter!
~~~~~~~~~~
The healthy heart tip for today is: If you want to get a start on health for your heart, take a walk! Walking costs nothing to get started and can be done in your very own neighborhood. Walking for as little as 30 minutes a day provides heart-health benefits.

Sign up for the Go Red Better U Program and receive two free romance e-books.

From Feb 1 through May 31, 2011, receive one free romance e-book when you sign up for the American Heart Association's Better U Program and one after you complete week six of the program. And look for the Eat Smart for Your Heart limited edition magazine (that features this offer) on newstands and in a grocery store near you.

Go Red for Women is trademarked by the American Heart Association, Inc. Romance novel downloads provided by Belle Books.

Banished Words

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

As readers and writers, I think we are more aware of words than most people. How many times have you been reading along and suddenly a word stops you cold because it doesn't seem to fit in the story? Or maybe the word is used incorrectly? Or, the same word has been repeated three or four times?

Yup, happens to me, too. And as a writer, I have to be careful of not doing any of those things in my own stories. This is where my critique partners and beta readers prove their value by spotting 'pet' words or phrases that I've overused. Two words I have a tendency to repeat are "that" and "just." One of my critique partners' pet word is "it." She once wrote a sentence with "it" used five times! YIKES! This is why we writers rely on revision.

Another thing that drives me to distraction is when I hear the same words and phrases repeated over and over by everyone around me. One such phrase that drove me bonkers back in the late 1990s was "don't go there." I swear I heard it at work a dozen times a day... every day! More recently, both the DH and I have developed a severe aversion to "at the end of the day."

Looks like Aunty is not the only one who would love to dump overused words. Recently, I ran across of list of "Banished Words" put together by the Lake Superior State University in Sault Saint Marie, Michigan. Back in 1975, the LSSU Public Relations Director and a few friends created "word banishment" and put together a list which they released on New Year's Day 1976. LSSU has released a new list of "Banished Words" every year since then. (If you want to see all the lists, go here http://www.lssu.edu/banished/.)

So here are a few of the words that made the banishment list for 2011:

VIRAL -- used to describe anything that has attracted a great deal of attention. Since when is a term for disease seen as popular or even positive?

EPIC -- used to describe common events. This is flat out incorrect. One commenter on the LSSU website said it perfectly, "... when the history books are written or updated and stories have been passed through the generations, the epic powder on the slopes during your last ski trip or your participation in last night's epic flash mob will probably not be included."

FAIL -- used as a noun or adjective meaning something less than perfect. The correct word is FAILURE. Fail is a verb.

FACEBOOK/GOOGLE -- used as verbs. Okay, I'll admit I'm guilty of sometimes saying, "Google it." But I haven't slipped so far as to say, "Facebook it, Danno!"

In case you were wondering (as I was) here are some of the Banished Words of 35 years ago in 1976:
MEANINGFUL
INPUT
SCENARIO
DETENTE

Any of those being back memories?

Do you have any "pet" words that you use too often? What about words and phrases that are so overused they make you want to scream? Which words and phrases would you like to banish?

Marie Force Celebrates Her "Fatal" Series

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

Our guest today is my good writer-buddy and frequent visitor to the Lair, Marie Force. Here are a few things you might not know about her:

Since 1996, Marie has been the communications director for a national organization similar to RWA. She is a member of RWA’s New England, From the Heart and Published Author Special Interest Chapters. While her husband was in the Navy, Marie lived in Spain, Maryland and Florida, and she is now settled in her home state of Rhode Island. She is the mother of Emily, 15, Jake, 12, and a feisty dog named Brandy. Marie is the author of a romantic suspense series, FATAL AFFAIR (June 2010) and FATAL JUSTICE (Jan. 2011), Books 1 and 2 in her new Fatal Series from Harlequin’s Carina Press. Book 3, FATAL CONSEQUENCES, is coming in July 2011, FATAL DESTINY in September 2011 and FATAL FLAW in February 2012.

AC: Welcome back to the Lair, Marie!

We’re thrilled to have you here to celebrate the release of your latest, Fatal Justice, the second book in your romantic suspense Fatal Series for Carina Press. Please tell us what your two lead characters Sam and Nick are up to in this latest story.

Marie: Hi there Aunty and all the Banditas! I’m so happy to back for another visit. Thanks for having me!

Sam and Nick return for another adventure in Fatal Justice. They’re newly in love and working out the boundaries of their relationship in the context of two high-pressure jobs: she’s a D.C. homicide detective and he’s a U.S. senator. In this book, Sam investigates the murder of a Supreme Court nominee with the added caveat that she and Nick were two of the last people to see the victim before he was killed. Also in Fatal Justice, Sam pursues a new lead into her father’s unsolved shooting that leads to danger for her. I’m really excited to get book 2 out to readers!

AC: And I can't wait to read it! What particular challenges have you faced in writing a series with the same couple as the main characters?

Marie: While writing Fatal Justice, I was enduring the roller coaster ride of Fatal Affair being on submission. I was disappointed that romance editors weren’t interested in a series featuring the same couple in every book. Boo! Thankfully, the ladies at Carina Press love the idea, and readers are telling me they do, too! I had a feeling they might…

The primary challenge as the series continues is keeping Sam and Nick’s relationship conflicted enough that it stays interesting but no so conflicted that it’s unrealistic. I found that to be a particular challenge in the third book, Fatal Consequences, which I finished in November. I’ve decided that readers don’t want to see them “fighting for their survival” in every book, so they will grapple with a lot of the stuff everyone deals with but in the context of their high-profile Washington lives.

AC: Sounds juicy! (rubs hands together with glee) What were some of the rewards?

Marie: I love slipping back into the Fatal world. It’s like putting on a comfortable pair of slippers. I’m working now on Fatal Destiny, the novella that will feature Sam and Nick’s wedding, and it gets easier with every book to submerge myself in the new story. I know the characters very well at this point. I said to someone recently that the scenes featuring Sam and Nick almost write themselves because I know exactly what each of them would say in most situations.

I’m also really enjoying the secondary characters, including Sam’s partner, Detective Freddie Cruz, Detective Tommy “Gonzo” Gonzales, Sam’s father Skip Holland, the O’Connors and the rest of the cast. I gave Freddie, Gonzo and Detective Jeannie McBride major subplots in Fatal Consequences and expect to further develop their characters in future books. Freddie is also prominently featured in Fatal Justice. He’s a trip to write!

AC: Since you also write contemporary romance as well as romantic suspense, do you use a different process?

Marie: I wish I could say my process is different for the suspense books, but I tend to fall back on the same chaotic seat-of-the-pants madness that has fueled all my books. I sold Fatal Consequences and book 4, Fatal Flaw, on proposal, which required synopses. While writing Fatal Consequences, I never once referred back to the synopsis , so it was the same process all over again even though I had done some initial plotting. I really hate knowing what’s going to happen ahead of time. I often have no idea “who done it” until Sam figures it out. I like it that way. It keeps me engaged in the book and the mystery.

However, one of these days my head is probably going to explode from keeping all this stuff locked up in my brain! That’s why I recently hired one of my Beta readers to index books 2 and 3 for me. I did the first book, Fatal Affair, myself and it took an entire weekend. Since I’m staring down a Feb. 28 deadline, I’m very grateful to my friend Aly for taking over the indexing job for me. As I write the fourth story, I’m finding it harder and harder to keep track of all the details, so it will be great to have a series “bible” to refer back to while working on future books.

In reference to the differences between contemporary and suspense, they don’t require different techniques mostly because the Fatal books are also contemporaries. However, it does take a significant amount of brain cells and bone marrow to keep the suspense portion of the Fatal books moving along at a good clip and to end up with a reasonable conclusion to the murder mystery.

AC: Where can readers find the Fatal series?

Marie: They’re available at Carina Press http://ebooks.carinapress.com (just look under "romantic suspense" on the sidebar) and everywhere e-books are sold. I’ve been asked a lot about where Nook users can find Fatal Justice if it’s not yet available on barnesandnoble.com, where it will be eventually. Nook users can download the ePub format from Carina.

AC: What’s next for you?

Marie: I have a print book out on Feb. 1, Everyone Loves a Hero. Also in February, I’ll be running a promotion to give readers the opportunity to plan Sam and Nick’s wedding. Watch my website at www.mariesullivanforce.com for details about how you can participate and win some great prizes.

Fatal Affair will be released in print by Harlequin in July via the eHarlequin website. Also in July is Fatal book 3, Fatal Consequences. The free wedding novella, Fatal Destiny, is out in September as part of Harlequin’s romantic suspense week. Book 4, Fatal Flaw, will be out in February of 2012.

I also recently posted two of my unsold contemporaries, True North and The Fall, to Amazon and have been blown away by the response from readers. That’s been very exciting!

AC: WOW! My head is spinning! 2011 promises to be a very busy year for you. Did you make any resolutions? Or do you have plans or wishes you hope to see fulfilled?

Marie: I never make resolutions and tend to avoid writing goals. I don’t like to set myself up for failure. However, I do hope to exercise more in 2011 and I have set just one goal for my writing career: to finally sell the book of my heart, Treading Water. We’ll see if either of those things happens! Let’s put it this way—the slim chance of a book sale is probably far more likely than the exercise! LOL!

I’m looking forward to chatting with the Banditas today! I’m always curious about what readers think of romance series featuring the same couple in numerous books. So let me know what you think of that, tell me some of your resolutions and the most important question of all: will Bachelor Brad actually choose one of the women this time around? Inquiring minds want to know! I’m happy to give away a copy of Fatal Justice to one of you!

Thanks again for having me.

Crazy Carols

posted by Aunty Cindy aka Loucinda McGary

On the 9th Day of Christmas my cabana boy gave to me
A post by Aunty Ciiiiindy!

Sorry, but it's December 21st, the shortest day of the year and only 4 more days until THE BIG DAY and Aunty is so far behind she can't even see the tunnel, much less any light at the end of it!

ACK!!!

This happens to me every year. I start off the month of December with great intentions and the next thing I know, it's less than a week until Christmas and I have NOTHING done! I wish I had the excuse of a looming deadline, or even a Dreaded Day Job, but I don't. I just have a difficult time getting into the spirit of the season...

Perhaps I need a bit more SPIRITS of the season... So pass the eggnog and Aunty has a little quiz to exercise our brains.

Back in the day, Aunty toiled away in the Land of Bureaucrats. Unlike romance writers, who strive to create clear and entertaining prose, all good Bureaucrats write to confuse and complicate. For example, instead of the Twelve Days of Christmas, a good Bureaucrat would call it The Dozen Festive 24-Hour Intervals.

Here then are the titles of some familiar and beloved Christmas Carols after the bureaucrats rewrote them. See how many you can figure out!

1. Embellish the interior passageways
2. Diminutive masculine master of skin-covered percussionistic cylinders
3. Obese personification fabricated of compressed minute ice crystals
4. Natal celebration devoid of color
5. Move hitherward the entire assembly of those who are loyal in their belief
6. Small municipality in Judea southeast of Jerusalem
7. Nocturnal time span of unbroken quietness
8. Delight for this planet
9. Frozen precipitation commence
10. To decry matriarchal osculation of Yuletide anthropomorphism (Aunty's personal favorite)

How many do you recognize? Or maybe you can come up with some alternate bureaucratic titles of your own. Please share!

The 12 Bandita Days prize will go to a randomly chosen commenter.

Non-Traditional Thanksgiving Traditions

posted by Loucinda McGary aka Aunty Cindy

A week from today here in the good ole USA we celebrate Thanksgiving. Ah yes, the holiday of gluttonous over-indulgence. But how did a day meant to give thanks for a bountiful harvest become the traditional day to over-eat?

I think I know...

Okay, maybe it's more like a theory since I don't have any proof, but I think the tradition of pigging out on Thanksgiving happened sorta by accident. I mean, it's easy to picture... everybody worked hard in the fields the past six or seven months. There's a huge spread of food and no way to save most of the left-overs... Everyone's talking and joking and you can't insult any of the cooks...

It could have happened!

Just like so many of the weird "traditions" in my family's Thanksgiving celebrations. Here are a few:

The Turkey Neck

A very long time ago when Aunty was just a little girl, Grandma was in a bad mood on Thanksgiving (probably because she was fixing dinner for about 30 people and nobody was helping her). Anyway, sometime just before we all sat down to dinner, Grandpa sneaked into the kitchen and then into the dining room, and put the turkey neck in the middle of her plate. Every one thought this was quite hilarious, including Grandma (which tells you something about our family), and for at least a decade after (even after Grandpa was gone) at every Thanksgiving dinner, SOMEONE (a different person every time) would walk into the dining room and find the turkey neck in the middle of their plate.

Black Olive Fingers

When Aunty was growing up, we were very much a meat & potatoes kind of family. A bowl of pitted black olives were reserved for special occasions like Easter, Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners. We kids were prone to piling a lot of them on our plates, and being fairly round, they often tended to roll off, which brought a stern reprimand from the nearest adult. To remedy this, one Thanksgiving my baby brother stuck an olive on each of his finger tips. Seeing how effective this method was, my older brother followed suit. My sister and I were far to sophisticated for such antics, and besides our fingers were too big (we were older).

No matter how many times my mother asked them not to, my brothers continued to eat their olives this way until their fingers also grew too large. But lest you think this tradition died out, my baby brother was fourteen when my son was born and by my son's second Thanksgiving, guess what his uncle had taught him to do?

Fruit Salad Topped Turkey

I wasn't exaggerating before when I mentioned 30 for Thanksgiving dinner. Easter and Thanksgiving were the two times every year when my aunts, uncles, and all my cousins would come over to eat. With that mob around the table, there was no such thing as seconds, at least not with anything good. If you couldn't fit it on your place the first time it was passed around, you were usually out of luck.

One year when my older brother was a young teen (and had the voracious teen boy appetite) he had no room left on his plate when the bowl of fruit salad came his way. Fresh fruit salad happens to be (still after all these years) one of my brother's favorite holiday dishes. He was not about to pass it on no matter how full his plate, so he piled a generous helping ON TOP of his slices of turkey. Halfway through the meal, my brother loudly proclaimed that his fruit salad topped turkey was the best he'd ever tasted. I confess I have never tried it, but to this day, my brother puts fruit salad on top of his turkey, and at least two of his daughters do too!

So there you have some of my family's non-traditional traditions for Thanksgiving dinner.

What about you? Do you have any unique things you do at Thanksgiving dinner? If you don't celebrate Thanksgiving, what about other holiday non-traditions? Aunty would hate to think that her family if the only weird one when it comes to holiday meals.