Saturday, December 1, 2007

You Know You're Too Busy When...

By Kirsten Scott

It's the season of giving, the season of joy, the season of cooking, cleaning, wrapping, crafting, churching...whew. I'm exhausted just thinking it. Add to that two kids in the Nutcracker (guess how I spend all my free time?) and a busy time at work and I have to say...

I think I'm going to lose my mind.

I've had two incidents this week that told me, in no uncertain terms, that I am too busy. Both involved bathrooms and my undersized bladder. The first happened on Tuesday, when I was desperately trying to get a copy of Anna Campbell's Untouched. I had a meeting downtown and a meeting back at my office a half hour after the first meeting ended. If I timed it right, walked fast and didn't hit the rest room after the meeting, I figured I had time to run through Borders and pick up a copy on my way back to the office.

I didn't count on my bladder. Naturally, I put first things first and TORE through the store. Ran from end-cap to end-cap, from new release table to the romance section. Nothing. Bladder was bursting but I had NOT included a pit stop in my calculations. I wanted to wait in line to beg the clerk to check in back but I couldn't risk it. Heartsick, doing the pee-pee dance, I ran the rest of the way back to the office, stayed (mostly) dry, and was late to the next meeting.

Then Wednesday morning, it got worse. Late for meeting number one of the day thanks to day care and drop off duties, had three calls waiting on the machine and a turkey sandwich that needed to get in the fridge. Raced through the office, dropped off the sandwich in the fridge, and headed for the meeting, bladder a' bursting. Decided I didn't want to have an accident this early in the morning, so I ran into the bathroom, threw open a stall and barely made it. Ahhh. Got up to leave and noticed something odd.

A urinal? In the girls room?

Slow realization. Utter horror. I ran out before I could discover if there were any other MALE co-workers in the other stalls.

I need to slow down. Desperately.

The problem is that I like being busy. I can't stand down time. I like reading emails on the BlackBerry while waiting in traffic. (Cringe--I know, I know! It's so wrong!) I like finding new ways to multi-task while riding the exercise bike. (The computer does fit on the display. Hurray!) I even like dashing around through the mall on my way back to the office between meetings.

But enough is enough.

It's a bit early for resolutions, but I'm making one now for this December season of madness and good cheer. I'm going to streamline something. I'm not sure what, but I'll find it. It may mean less crafting and baking. It may mean work doesn't get done. The house may be messier than I'd like. But by golly, I'm finding the time to go to the bathroom.

So, what's your goal this holiday season? Making some of those incredible cookie recipes you read about on Suz's blog? Going to that performance of Handel's Messiah? Spending more time with the kiddies? Volunteering at a shelter? Tell me! And if you've got a good story about a time when YOU were too busy, I'd like to hear that too!


Tawny said...


Anna Campbell said...

Oh, man! This just ain't right! I haven't even read the blog yet. I just came straight to the GR! I'll get you, Tawny Bandita! I'll get you good! ;-)

Anonymous said...

Well done Tawny!! :-) It was neck and neck around the curve, but you beat her by a nose!

Helen said...

Kirsten how do you do it I need my time and bathroom time is so important to me I am 50 years old and have had 4 children I need to be able to get to a bathroom wherever I go.
I am starting to get a bit stressed at the moment I haven't even made my chrissy list up yet but I have my third xmas cake in the oven now as I type it is just about due out so at least I have done something and I also brought the xmas cards today and I will start to write them out tomorrow while I am cooking another cake and I hope to go shopping with hubby tomorrow as well and make a start on the pressies.
Well done Tawny the gr must be startin to missing Oz
Have Fun

Tawny said...

I'm making Suz's cookies right now! (in between snagging the GR, bwahaahaahaaa) and they smell SO good!!!

So... resolutions for the holidays - to stay sane. Thats it :-) I have to promo for my January release, so I'm juggling our regular holiday fun, two local RWA chapter commitments, and promo. Oh, and two deadlines. So the housecleaning was hired out right before Thanksgiving and most of the shopping is done.

And other than the candycane hearts I'm making right now for tomorrow's party (of which I figure Suz's cookies will star) I'm done with crafts. Nope, not doing the scrapbook gifts I'd planed... not even finishing the huge pile of handmade cards I was making. Something has to go...

other than my sanity.

Tawny said...

tee hee hee.

I didn't read it either, Anna, just swooped in, giggling the whole way!!!

Kristen... hon, we do need to talk about getting you a few more bathroom breaks! I can't fault you the email while driving though :-( I'm such an email addied I'd even email during ... um, wait, no I wouldn't *beg*

Tawny said...

addied= addict

geeze, I'm so giddy to have the GR I can't even type.

p226 said...

Hahah, that was a funny post. I've been so busy I've forgotten to make time for.... essential activities.

But... I've got your "whoops went into the wrong bathroom" thing beat by a LONG shot. Oh man.

But do I dare share it?

Tawny said...

share... sharing is good :-)

p226 said...

I dunno.... it's kinda long...

And well... embarrassing... and ... sorta bathroom related.

Christine Wells said...

Come ooonnnn, P226, we wanna know! You can't leave us to speak:)

Tawny said...

ROFLMAO Christine :-D you are baaaaad

p226 said...

um... ok.

This probably isn't a good idea...

I probably shouldn't do this.

But, I slapped together a quick web page since I'd already written up the um.... incident.

You can read here.

Anna Campbell said...

Hey, with a nose like mine, that's never happened before! ;-)

Kirsten, your embarrassing posts make me...ahem! wet myself with laughing! This is up there with the commando one! I'm glad the green monster had you so excited. Good thing it wasn't a yellow monster! Ooh. And perhaps STREAM-lining isn't exactly what you should be doing right now.

Honestly, this time of year always leaves me feeling like a wrung out rag and this year I've got writing commitments to worry about too. And really want to do some Christmas baking. I've bought the ingredients. It's getting organised to do the cooking now! Hey, does anyone want to come to my place and write a synopsis? Free cookies to anyone who volunteers!

P226 - just off to check your story out...

Anna Campbell said...

Oh, man, P226! And I mean OH, MAN!!!

Anonymous said...

helen, your todo list is very impressive! Four cakes? Wow, you either have a lot of friends or get invited to all the best parties! :-) I did almost all of my shopping the day after Thanksgiving, the day we call Black Friday here in the states. You can start shopping at 5am, and if you get up earlier than that (I did, at 4:30) you get in line at the stores to get the best deals. It's insane but oddly fun. At least, some crazy people think so. teehee.

Anonymous said...

Tawny, do you have a list for this, by any chance? I know you do! I've got my Christmas present list in Excel this year--I've got budget and actual prices. Neat. huh? I thought you might approve!

Oh, and I certainly would never reply to those emails while...oh heck, I can feel my nose growing as I type.

But only when there's no traffic around. Really.

Anonymous said...

p226, I hope all your, er, parts, have returned to normal by now! That sounded like quite an incident! I got a great image of a cartoon character running around in a circle with steam coming out of his ears. Love it. Thanks for the laugh! (We're like blood brothers or something, now, because we've shared embarrassing stories on the web for millions of people to read.)

Anonymous said...

Anna, I swear I do not manufacture these embarrassing incidents for your amusement, But having experienced the embarrassment, I figure it should serve some purpose and entertain someone.

By the way--time to change the avatar to the Green Monster, no?

Caren Crane said...

Kirsten, we love you and are not laughing at you, merely about you. I, too, have wandered into the men's room. Fortunately, not when my eyes were floating 'cause I had to go so bad. Unfortunately, there was a very modest Indian guy at the urinal at the time.

Yes, he saw me. Yes, this was at work, so I had to see him every day for years afterward and, on occasion, work with him. Yes, I thought of it EVERY TIME I saw him. It was just that embarrassing! In my defense, it was my first day at a new job (that I had for 14 year--sheesh).

P226, I was just passing by on my way back to sleep this morning, but had to check out your story. OMG! Glad hosing off the equipment worked. You're lucky there was no "fire in the hole". Yow!

Caren Crane said...

Okay, to the question at hand. My goal for the holiday season is to keep it simple (and by that, I mean shopping online *g*) and to do as little as possible.

Somehow, since I'm having parties at my house on Dec. 12 and Dec. 31, that's not working out. Yes, I realize this is self-defeating, in a way. But I love parties! The good thing is, I don't have one of those showcase homes, so I don't worry about everything being "just so". The bad thing is, it still has to look nice. There is much work to be done. The decorating starts today!

Must go call bff and get her over here forthwith...

Christie Kelley said...

Kirsten, your post made me laugh because I've been there and done that with my own small bladder. My husband makes fun of me because I CANNOT leave the house for any reason without going to the bathroom.

The one thing that helped when I had younger kids and worked full time was the internet. I bought (and still do today) the majority of my holiday stuff online. It was worth paying for the shipping.

My holiday resolution this year is different from other years. This year I'm trying my best not to get down about the fact that I don't know if I'll have a place to put up my tree this year. My husband thinks the builder might be done enough with the kitchen/family room addition by 20th or so. I'm not so positive. I'm starting to think we might have to race to NY on Xmas Eve and do Christmas morning with my mother. I know she won't mind but it's hard for her. So we'll see. But I'm determined to make Christmas cookies!

Christie Kelley said...

p226, I'm so glad I'd finished my coffee when I read your blog. OMG!!

doglady said...

Kirsten, thanks for a great laugh to start my day! I am off to Wal-Mart hell and we have two wedding cakes to do so I needed that!! Now I have to jump over to p226's blog to read because your hints are all too intriguing! No takers on the synopsis offer, LaCampbell? Gee, I wonder why! (LaCampbell as in LaCallas because you are officially a diva of the written word!)I just want to get thru the season without killing anybody. Working where I do it is going to be a close call! I have my head down to get my GH entry ready so now that I can look up for a moment I will get my Christmas cards out, finish my shopping and then right back to the keyboard!

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Okay guys and dolls, starting the day with coffee coming out my nose is a little disconcerting. You all should post some kind of warning for events such as these. "WARNING" do not read while drinking beverages!
I must have a bladder the size of TX, I know I am strange, I see this proven every day, ladies and gents going to potty throughout the day and I never go.
I always wondered if pepper spray hurt the skin or if the danger was having it sprayed in your eyes, that answered my question P226. I could just see the whole situation as I was reading, two coffee incidents in one day was a little much you guys, now I have to clean my desk and take another shower...LOL

Susan Seyfarth said...

I'm racing out the door to get some xmas shopping done (at 9 a.m. CST, boy am I a slacker compared to 4:30 a.m. Kirsten), but I couldn't leave without chiming in re: itty bitty bladders. I once got stuck in traffic on the way to the Field Science Museum in Chicago. I'd treated myself to an enormous Diet Coke on the way & by the time we finally got there I had to pee so bad I was actually crying. Weeping with relief in the bathroom stall. People in neighboring stalls are probably still telling the story.

I have a friend who, when stopped cold in traffic for several hours due to a traffic accident, actually peed in her dog's water dish, which she happened to have handy.

And P226, I will go to my grave imagining your doppler holler.


Anonymous said...

Caren, I love having parties too, so I understand the dilemna. And in our hearts, we love the chaos, right? :-) I bet you're a fabulous hostess. Wish I could be there for your New Years party (though I usually go to sleep at 9PM and miss it entirely). I bet it will be a blast.

And thanks for sharing your own moment of confusion! I can't tell you how relieved I was that no one saw me. And that I saw no one. Whew! Can't imagine having to look that man in the eye for the next 14 years. Wow.

Anonymous said...

Christie, my husband is convinced that this whole bladder problem is a "girl thing." I told him it's because we've got a lot of extra equipment we need to fit in down there. ;-)

It would be hard to go through Christmas without a place to put the tree, and all the other trimmings for that matter. Good on you for keeping a stiff upper lip about it. And it's great that you have your mom to call on for a little Christmas miracle. Good luck getting through it with your optimism intact. (((HUGS)))

Anonymous said...

Doglady, I can't wait for you to final in the GH. It will be like one of our own Banditas finaling!! Good luck getting that entry done and out the door. And I am also going to have to put the cuffs on to keep from killing someone at work. It would be very Un-Christmas-y of us, wouldn't it? ;-)

Dianna, you should thank your lucky stars for that bladder! Not many of us ladies have them. And I will seriously consider a warning label. ;-)

Anonymous said...

Susan, that 4:30AM CST visit to the blog was actually 2:30AM PCT! I've got a bad cough and was up anyway, so I decided to pretend I was in Oz and it was the middle of the afternoon. :-) I love the image of you crying with relief in the bathroom...that could be me on almost any given day of the week, lately.

Did I ever tell you about the incident on the bus in Mexico? I was riding from Loreta to La Paz, a significant ride, and my Spanish was not so good. I had just come off a three month trip in the backcountry, and was used to drinking massive amounts of water, so you can imagine where this is going. I assumed the bus would make some potty stops, but after a few hours with an incredibly painful bladder, and no signs of stopping, I realized I had to take matters into my own hands. I pulled down an old t-shirt from my backpack, and luckily had a plastic bag as well. I wadded up the t, stuffed it in my shorts, and relieved myself, and put that into the plastic bag. To this day, I have no idea how I accomplished this without everyone seeing, but I recall being very proud of myself that I was so discrete. :-)

Good luck with your Christmas shopping! And check for the restrooms before you get in too far!

jo robertson said...

Too funny post, Kirsten. Congrats on the GR, Tawny. Hey, I'm gonna bask in my one win of the GR and let you other Banditas duke it out!

Your bathroom incident reminds me of when I was very, very pregnant, at the movies with my husband while he waited outside the door -- TO THE MEN'S ROOM -- didn't even try to stop me! He thought it was hilarious, this 9-month pregnant woman. I figured, hey I'm here, whatever! A girl's gotta do!

Hmmm, my goal this holiday season is to simplify, simplify, simplify. Sometimes the whole season gets too overwhelming, so I've simplied the decorations, simplied the outdoor stuff, the gifts, the baking -- okay, not so much the baking. Yum, yum!

Keira Soleore said...

Kirsten and P226: Thank you very much for the Saturday morning funnies.

P226: I would love to read your memoirs!!!

We're traveling out of the country right after Christmas. So I'm stressing out already about how I'm going to have the decorations down on Boxing day, last minute packing done, and everything set to go.

panic... I still have to get my 100+ holiday cards out.

jo robertson said...

OMG, P226, that was hilarious! Uh, maybe the pepper spray people should put a warning label on the product. Danger, inappropriate use may cause equipment failure.

Kirsten, peeing in a shirt on a bus; however did you manage that discreetly? Uh, I think we need to re-educate you about the meaning of discreet! There's probably a little old Mexican man having strange dreams about busses even as we speak.

I have only one word to say about tiny bladders and many children -- bladder suspension grafts! They do work wonders.

Okay, who got Anna started on the puns again??!!

p226 said...

There's probably a little old Mexican man having strange dreams about busses even as we speak.

That.... that brought me to TEARS laughing. Can't stop.

Trish Milburn said...

LOL! Oh my, all these stories are cracking me up. You all are way braver than me to share.

flchen1 said...

Congrats, Tawny! ;)

And wow, Kirsten, I'm not good at not peeing if I have to (especially since the kids) so yowza... please make time for those potty breaks when you need them, seriously! Didn't your mom tell you it wasn't healthy to hold it?

p226, going to check out your tale of woe now...

Brave souls, you both to share :)

Kate Carlisle said...

Awww Jeez, Kirsten! You've done it again!! LOL -- and where do you find those pictures?? Hilarious!!

P226, your story was priceless!!! Thanks for that!

Tawny, congrats on the GR snag! it just feels right to have the bird here on the West Coast. ;-)

By the way, Kirsten, if you need to cut back on something, my choice would be that whole scary exercise bike routine. Those things can be dangerous!!

Christine Wells said...

Kirsten, so sorry, blogger ate my posts last night and I had people coming over so I didn't check that they'd worked.

Your post was hilarious! My only bathroom crisis involved being pregnant, walking a looong distance home from a dinner where I drank a lot (non-alcoholic) and a coughing fit. I will say no more:)

My problem with time is I put off all those terrible things like visits to the dentist, doctor, etc and things reach a crisis point before I make time to go. I *hate* waiting in waiting rooms and I always have something with me to do.

Ack p226!!! Thanks so much for sharing...I think.

Aunty Cindy said...

P226, I do believe your story takes TOP HONOR for Most Beverages Snorted On Keyboards everywhere!

Oh I could tell ya bathroom stories! Most would probably involve "squat & aims," my designation for those 2 bricks and a hole found all over Asia and some places in Europe, or some uncomfortable situations the DH has found himself in, while I was busy laughing... However, I shall restrain myself since NONE can top P226's tale of woe nor Kirsten's t-shirt on the bus act. (How DID you think of that?!?!)

Let me just echo flchen's warning, Kirsten. Holding it for sooo long CAN cause UT issues. Back me up here nurses.

who has suffered from TB (tiny bladder) for decades

Joan said...


And here all the experts say to squirt it in the eyes!!! LOL.

I've had a couple of instances of "accidently" walking into the men's bathroom (Once at Disney I was following along behind my brother, not paying any attention and followed him halfway in. He turned and said "What the?")

Anyway, imagine if we'd walked in while the "equipment" was getting hosed?

My goals are set in increments. Right now it is to bring my *^%$$ Christmas tree up from the basement by Tuesday.

Have fun at the Nutcracker, Kirsten. Last Sunday I went to a performance of it by the Russian ballet. Man, those Russians can dance!

Anonymous said...

Jo, do you mean to tell me that you walked into the boys room and didn't bat an eye, just took care of business anyway? Wow. I am in awe of you. That's guts. And simplify--yes, excellent goal. I'm not sure I could begin to achieve it, but it's an excellent goal...And I really was discrete! I don't remember how, but I was! Honest! :-)

Keira, I'm jealous of your travel plans, but not jealous of all the work that you'll have to do to get away. More power to you, sister! And as for Christmas cards? Don't get me started. I just call them New Years cards and give it up from the start.

Trish, you wait, you'll get crazy/brave like us. It's catchy. ;-)

Anonymous said...

flchen, it isn't that I hold it too long--I just drink a lot of water and have no bladder control. Sometimes I'm going every hour. It's a curse. And by the way, after I heard a story once about a guy who held his pee too long and had his bladder explode, I'm terrified of holding too long. Thus the horrible Mexican bus story. Normal people probably could have held it, but not me! No way!

Kate, exercise bikes really aren't that dangerous. ;-) I mean, in the grand scheme of things, driving and BlackBerry-ing is probably far worse! Uh...not that I do that. I mean, did I really admit that I do that? Sheesh. What was I thinking?

Christine, I was a wreck when I was pregnant. I had to sit for my Bar exam when I was eight months, and I was seriously considering getting a catheter so I wouldn't have to get up every 45 minutes to use the restroom during the eight hour exam. Your coughing fit was the proverbial drop in the bucket compared to me. Sneezing and walking were definitely not an option for me. ;-)

Anonymous said...

AC, I'm glad I have you in my court! Tiny bladder women of the world unite! I'd love to hear more of those stories, by the way...maybe when we're partying in San Fran. Nothing says party like a good pee story. Snort.

Joan, I'm jealous of you going to see Russian dancers. We had some eight year old girls doing the Russian dance part from the Nutcracker tonight, but it didn't really compare...and good luck getting that $##@$# tree up! We've got to haul ours up from the basement this weekend too. Not looking forward to that!

Caren Crane said...

Kirsten, I meant to check back in yesterday and say that I am a card-carrying member of the TB club. Like Christie, I will not get into a car - not even to go to the pharmacy on the corner - without using the bathroom first. Three children will do that to a girl! *g*

Also, I would totally have done what you did on the bus in Mexico. In the very early 70s, when there really were no such things as gas stations with bathrooms, we had 10 people in a station wagon on a road trip from Nashville, TN to Tionesta, PA (middle of nowhere - I mean, God's country). Somewhere in Ohio, Mama (who bore 5 children, God bless her) had to go.

Now, Ohio is flat and treeless in many parts. Her solution was to haul out a quart-sized Mason jar she had just for the purpose and haul up her sundress and go. All of us kids were shamed, horrified and disgusted (though she was quite discreet). I was never gladder to be riding in the way back!

Lily said...

My goal is just relax... I have a complete week off... and I just want to read!! and eat!!

barbara.bergin said...


Listen, holiday times are stressful. A couple of years ago I had all my holiday shopping done two months ahead of time. I had no out of town company staying with me. The weather was wonderful and I felt great. I was even trying to think of new people for whom to buy Christmas presents! So what does any cheerful holiday soul do when they’re all caught up and feeling great? Go down to the local blood bank to donate a pint. Other people must have either needed money or were in the same mood as I because there was a huge line of donors. One by one they kept getting turned away after they got their finger stick for the blood count. I started to wonder what was going on. As I got closer to the front of the line I could overhear that they were anemic. I started feeling proud, knowing that I would have a healthy hemoglobin and might be their first and only donor that day. My mouth started watering for those little cookies and hot chocolate at the end. But after my finger stick I was promptly told I was anemic. Anemic! Me? I’m a physician and I knew of no reason why I would be anemic. Alas, the attendant told me it was the holidays and most people were stressed, which resulted in anemia. I left the blood bank hungry, depressed and…anemic. I quickly went out and bought food and clothing…for myself. I felt better.

So, eat liver and be merry,

Barbara Bergin
author of "Endings"