Celebrate Yourself

by Christine Wells

Now I know it's that time of year when people list their resolutions with hope in their hearts and grim determination in their guts. We promise ourselves any number of things, from spending more quality time with our families to living a healthier lifestyle. For an interesting take on new year's resolutions, go here.

So... Thanksgiving is over. The holiday season has come and gone. New Year fizzled shortly after the last firework and now it's time to get serious, get disciplined, start whipping yourself into... WAIT!

No no no no no. We're not going there today.

After all, this IS the Bandit Lair.

Instead of choosing what stick you're going to beat yourself with this year, how about a resolution to be kind to yourself? Now, I'm not saying you shouldn't set goals and take determined steps to achieve them, but why don't we all spend a few minutes thinking of how we will celebrate when we make our resolutions reality?

Have you thought how much better you will feel when your goal is accomplished? Have you thought how your life will change? Try to imagine yourself *having* achieved, rather than whipping yourself for not achieving. Does that make it easier to toil toward those goals? Tawny Weber is our resident goal setting specialist. She has a wonderful article on visualizing your goals.

How do you celebrate everyday achievements like getting all your chores done, or a small success at work? Drink a good cup of coffee? Take a glass of wine with dinner? Buy that book you've been wanting to read? Work through a particularly challenging aerobics session? (Yes, there are people on this earth who see exercise as a reward, or so my dh tells me.) Even simply acknowledging to yourself that you have done something good and worthy of celebration can be celebration enough.

What about the big things? A friend of mine buys a new gold charm for her charm bracelet each time she sells a book. That bracelet is filling up fast and it reminds her whenever she wears it that she should be proud of her achievements. When I sold my first two books I bought two large prints of the beautiful covers James Griffin created for me. They hang, framed, on my study wall.

Now, I don't want to come off as all preachy about this. Being kind to myself isn't something I've managed to do very well until now. My writing friends do not call me Eeyore for nothing! But if, like me, you find the same, unfulfilled resolution popping up on that list each year, try picturing yourself having fulfilled your own promise to yourself and what you'll do when that occurs.

As for me, when I fulfill my biggest goal I shall buy my own island and hire the cabana boys to cater to my every whim while Sven serves me cocktails with rude names by the pool and Joanie's Romans whoosh down the waterslide on their shields. And yah, that is me in the pink bathing suit--well, in my dreams it is! For smaller goals, I might buy myself flowers, or even hire a babysitter and take my husband to the movies.

So, tell me your ideas for celebrating success -- big or small. If you're a goal setter and you'd like to share, tell me what your 2010 resolutions are. If not, maybe you'd like to think up a way the Banditas can celebrate our next anniversary. After all, three years together in blogland is a major achievement, isn't it?