Saturday, November 8, 2008

Is there a Doctor in the House???

by Jeanne Adams
I like doctors. I like them in person, on television and generally, as human beings. There are a few exceptions, trust me. However, for the most part, I think anyone who is willing to dedicate their lives to listening to people worry, whine, sob, and express various bodily functions toward said doctor deserves not only a huge salary but possibly sainthood.

There really isn't enough money printed to get me to do this. Any of it.

Start with med school. From the hazing to the weed-em-out-tests to the brutal rotations through specialties you would never contemplate (podiatry, anyone?), there pretty much is nothing fun about med school. I think of it like nine years of intensive, mental boot camp. People yell at you, spit on you, make you wade through unmentionable substances - everything I've ever seen on every movie about Marines in training - and what do you get for this suffering? Well, like the Marines, you get to go do thankless, dangerous stuff. Woo-hoo!

Come to think of it, they should probably pay Marines and Nurses what they pay Doctors, considering the workload.

I'm tellin' ya' - NOT enough money printed to get me to do this.

I do understand the challenge. Really, I do. I love intellectual puzzles. I love solving things. I even like the kind of physical challenges posed by being a Marine. Very cool. What I don't like is the massive, perpetual downside.

The most innocuous downside is still substantive. Blood, and lots of it, some of which might bear diseases that can kill you. Now I'm not afraid of blood, or bothered by the sight of it, and I'm more than willing to splash around a considerable amount of blood in my books, and make other people wade through it.

Hey, a girl's gotta have her fun. :> However, I would not, will not (with a fox, or a mouse, or a goat) do any of said wading myself.

Then there's those other noxious substances. I'm sure the nurses on our Bandita Team can wax very grim about those "other" substances.

SOOOOO not going THERE.

Why then, you ask, am I going on about this heinous topic? Well, last Sunday, I spent three hours in the ER. Not the attractive one on television with various attractive Slavic or swarthy, heroic doctor types. No. The real one. With a very sore, very hurt little boy who couldn't figure out why a fall off the bed HURT so darn much. Not like he hasn't done it before, right?

This time, he broke his collar bone. OUCH.

Where's Dr. McDreamy when you need him? Nary a studly man in sight, except my equally worried spouse.

Come to think of it, he'd look good in scrubs, or in that white lab coat. He's got a serious demeanor, very trustworthy. He'd make a splendid doctor, since he doesn't faint at blood or that other stuff.

(He used to play rugby. Does that tell you anything?)

But no cute guys in scrubs appeared. The nice man who helped us with our son's injury was about five-seven (my height), with big glasses and a nice smile which he reserved for my husband. I like to look at my husband that way too, but I'm not particularly thrilled when other MEN do. (No offense to gents of that persuasion, but HEY! MINE!)

Harrrrumpf! However, the doc pronounced the collar bone broken as he perused the x-rays, informed us that there isn't much to do about it, gave us Motrin and sent us home with a very weary, confused little boy.

I have to confess that I'm going to engage in a bit of Writer's Revenge. What is that, you ask? Ah....I'm going to write this guy into a book and kill him off.


It wasn't that he was bad, its just that he wasn't GOOD. Kind of like the "red-shirt" guy they joke about at Star Trek conventions. He's the scapegoat that beams down with the exploration party and gets killed. Yep. Expendable. Grins.

Anyway, like everything in my life, good, bad, and odd, it'll end up in a story at some point. That's the way my mind works even when I'm not engaging in Writer's Revenge. The doctor in the book won't look the same, but will act the way this one did. He may even become a she, since then it'll be even more fun to kill him off for looking at my hubby. *VEG*

So here's some questions for the day:
Have you ever broken a bone? Did it become a "weather-wise ache?"

Have you ever actually seen a doctor as gorgeous as McDreamy, the ER guys, or the generally elegant guys on General Hospital?

If you are a doctor (or play one on TV), was medical school as bad as it seems from the outside? Or is it worse?

Nurses? Same question...

Last but not least, do you engage in Writer's Revenge?

Let's hear some stories, guys!


flchen1 said...

No doctor at my house!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hey, Fedora, you minx you, the GR's bringing his stethoscope to YOUR house, I see!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Off to bed, now that I've got the post, posted. :> I'll look forward to everyone's answers in the morning...

flchen1 said...

Hmm... a few answers to the questions for the day:
- Uh, I've never broken one of my own bones. (That sounds pretty bad, doesn't it? When I was a kid, I accidentally slammed the door on my little brother's pinky, so yes, I've broken one of his bones. I'm not sure whether it aches in weather, but since he's already got a trump card for nearly all arguments, I'm not asking...)

- I've never seen a doctor as gorgeous as the TV varieties--I have to say I'm relieved though. I'd be more likely to become a blithering idiot in their presence and be even less likely to get appropriate care for myself or children...

- Never been to medical or nursing school, but hats off to all you in the medical profession. Thank you for the care you provide! (We do have doctor friends, including one who did an MD/PhD, plus an assortment of residencies, etc.--that is a WHOLE lotta school! (I couldn't handle the blood OR the school!)

And not being much of a writer, I haven't yet engaged in Writer's Revenge, but it does sound like a potentially good way to take care of some of those otherwise festering resentments... I'll have to give that some thought!

Hugs to you and your son, Jeanne! Hope he's healing nicely!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Thanks Fedora, he is healing nicely. We saw an orthopedic doc and we got a "cool" brace which gives him more support. Between that and the Motrin, he's doing great. Besides, he's a strong little trooper!

I'm told that nearly 4-year-old bones heal so quickly that in 6 months we wouldn't be able to tell it was broken, were we to x-ray it again.

I'll wait and see on that one, but hope it's true! :>

Helen said...

Congrats flchen enjoy your day with him

Great post Jeanne

I broke a toe once very painful and yes it aches every now and then haveing four children only one of my children has ever broken any bones and she has broken her left arm twice and her right arm once so she really made up for the other 3 and yes she complains that they ache

As for dreamy Doctors no not here in Australia either although one of my hubby's Doctors is rather good looking and very caring but we don't see him much.

I have't been to nurse or doctor school but I am sure it would have been tough

Love the writers revenge Jeanne can't wait to read it LOL

Have Fun

jo robertson said...

Very clever post, Jeanne, and I needed it this late at night. Whoooot, girl!

Hmmm, being a doctor sounds so sexy doesn't it? My husband, Dr. Big, is a doctor, but he's fond of saying he's the kind of doctor that doesn't do anybody any good, tee hee. Those intellectual types, you know.

But YES, my cardiologist is a wonderfully handsome and perfectly kind man, a really sexy combination. I don't let the fact that he's twenty years or so my junior keep me from fantasizing about him, however, and I never mind my cardio visits.

Hmmm, wonder if I can figure out a reason to go next week?

Go, Flchen, go flchen!

Helen said...

I am glad to hear he is healing. My daugheter was 3 the first time she broke an arm and it was pefectly healed in about 4 weeks

Have Fun

Natalie Hatch said...

I must confess. I worked my way through Uni by doing night shift at the local general hospital and got to know a lot of the staff. We had some very #HOT# male doctors who I just happened to date. Yep they were hot to trot and I had a great time (although I was a good girl, very very tempted to break my vow of celibacy many many times, but I controlled myself). And yes what you've heard about foreign doctors and local nurses is true, there's a lot of action going on behind the scenes that you wouldn't believe.
I did my undergrad with the view of going on to med school, even sat the exams, but became an instant mother and had to put that on hold. Maybe one day I'll go back to it.

Natalie Hatch said...

oh and I had a weak spot for the Irish doctors, their accents could almost woo the knickers right off me! (almost)

Anna Sugden said...

What a fun post, Jeanne. Big hugs to your brave little man - hope he's feeling better soon.

I nearly went the medic route - had a place at the top Med School in the UK, only to fluff one of my exams. I'm sure the world of medicine had a lucky escape and the business world got a lucky break!

Yes, I have had a sexy doc - not in the ER (do not get me started on incompetent docs - one in particular! Though I must say I've had a couple of superhero paramedics!)

My UK specialist for my endometriosis is definitely McDreamy. A couple of parents at the school where I used to teach went to him too and we'd always compare notes and be envious when one of us had an appointment with him!

Oh yes, on the revenge. Very subtle, but there nonetheless. I'm still working out a few particularly interesting revenges for certain individuals from my past - may need you, or Lisa Gardner or Tess Gerritsen to make the revenge ... appropriate *g*

Terry Odell said...

What's the point of being a writer if you can't indulge in a little revenge. I killed off one of my daughter's professors for her.

Joan said...

Ahhhhh....the medical world.

First off, I'm so glad your baby is recovering and that he got the splint/brace.

Being an orthopaedic (bones) nurse I have cared for about every fracture you could think of and some you might not (took care of a guy with a fractured p*nis...I kid you not and unfortunately, cannot elaborate on this blog about it)

Casting was a bear :-)

Anyway, the "weather" phenomena, though still disputed by experts, occurs when the fracture occurs more in a joint area i.e fractured ankle/knee/shoulder. When you fracture in an area like this you develop arthritis and you'll find...even if you have "plain ole" arthritis... that you already have this gift of knowing when a cold front is coming.

Ouch, my knees.

As to McDreamy's? Haven't seen a lot of that since my days as a brand new nurse. And unless they are in the ER of the local teaching hospital, these new docs do NOT seem to share the world of blood or *ahem* OTHER bodily excrements as the nurses get to enjoy. In fact, I will be assisting a patient off the bedpan and they'll say "Oh, don't let the doctor see". Doesn't matter if the NURSE does, but don't let the doctor know about it. Aghhh

I can identify with you Natalie about the Irish docs. When I started there was the black haired, blue eyed Irish doc who could melt me with a "Do ye have a pen, nurse?" everytime. He still practices but alas his accent has faded with the gray in his hair.


Louisa Cornell said...

Under no circumstances let that Rooster operate on you, Fedora! I have it on very good authority that he flunked out of med school!

I have never broken any bones, which is a miracle considering my many falls from horses (over horses' heads, under horses' hooves, over hedges, etc) and my hang gliding, bungee jumping, mountain climbing and learning to snow ski. (spent more time on my butt than on my feet!)

Worked as a vet tech for five years so I completely understand the bodily functions/secretions aspect of any kind of medical work. Not to mention the fact that my patients, more often than not, were trying to bite me, scratch me, kill me, and just plain get away. One of the vets I worked with explained my job very simply. "It is your job to get bitten and to keep ME from getting bitten!"

However, I was lucky enough to work in the animal emergency clinic one night a week for those five years with two of the dreamiest vets on the rotation. The other nights were staffed by the old vets, lady vets and less appealing vets. I worked with Dr. Jim and Dr. Eric and they were great guys AND very easy on the eyes. Dr. Jim is a former bull rider, 6 foot 8, golden blond curly hair and big blue eyes. Dr. Eric is 6 foot 3, jet black hair, big brown puppy dog eyes. The thing I loved the most about them was their compassion. The animal ER is expensive. Many owners would find out how much the procedures cost and say "Just put him/her down." These two guys would say okay. Get the release signed and when the owners left they would patch the animal up and end up taking it to their day-time clinic and find a home for it. Gotta love it!

Didn't go to med school, but my late DH did. NOT FUN!! To become a shrink you still have to do all of the regular rotations. Then you have to do internships in various mental institutions. He even did one in the Whitfield Facility for the Criminally Insane in Mississippi. If you have seen the movie, A Time to Kill, it is the one Roarke breaks into to get those records that screw over the state shrink. And they filmed it at the actual facility.

Yes, I have used writer's revenge to get even with some people. VERY SATISFYING!!

Joan said...

Not to mention the fact that my patients, more often than not, were trying to bite me, scratch me, kill me, and just plain get away.

Sounds like a lot of patients we get nowadays too! :-)

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Jeanne, oh, I hope he does heal as quickly as they say. Young ones do seem to bounce back quickly.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...
So here's some questions for the day:
Have you ever broken a bone? Did it become a "weather-wise ache?"

Have you ever actually seen a doctor as gorgeous as McDreamy, the ER guys, or the generally elegant guys on General Hospital?

I can't answer all the questions as they don't apply but... I can answer two.

Broken bones, yes and yes they have become weather-wise aches! I broke my fingers, twice. Once on my cousin, we were fighting over a book, yes, a book, imagine that! and he bloodied my nose, I in turn tried to break his face but he ducked and I hit a door facing and broke my fingers (two of them) I also got a spanking because I was "mouthy" (still hadn't reined the temper in and when dad said not to fight with William in his house I asked if I could fight with him in mine)
The second time, (same two fingers) was in karate, basically I am a defensive fighter, I defend very well but am not really offensive by nature, unless you hurt me. During a round of kumate (free fighting) a blue belt clipped me in the jaw with his foot, snapped my head back (I think I still have whip lash)the sen seis stopped the fighting, made sure I wasn't seriously injured (no, I wasn't, just ticked off)and it was resumed, my dojo more or less closed ranks and allowed me to back ole blue belt in the corner and I tried to do him like injury, resulting in broken fingers, again.... Needless to say, I don't do that anymore, it hurts.

My son fractured the growth plate in his shoulder. Bless his heart communication is difficult at best with him and he was hurt for a day before I got him help, that sounds so, so terrible I know but I swear it couldn't be helped. He fell down some steps and I saw him hit his elbow when he fell. Straight down to the next step on his backside, elbow jammed down on the step above. He complained that his "elbow" hurt and I looked and applied ice and other than a little bruising the elbow seemed fine. I was relieved but he was still in pain (which is saying something as he doesn't "feel" things like most people do) the next day he is still in pain, I am getting panicky because I can find no visible owie. Take him to be x-rayed and it wasn't his elbow, it was his shoulder and he had fractured the growth plate. My son was 14 at the time and still has trouble identifying some body parts, I think he knows what they are but uses the wrong words to identify them sometimes. He has a tendency to move a little more stiffly in poor weather too.

My daughter broke her pinky finger playing ball with her grandmother (my mother)she was backing up to catch the ball, hit the edge of the driveway and put her hand back to protect her backside and broke her finger instead. She also fell down some steps at church and broke two bones in her wrist (have you notice me and my children all have trouble with stairs??) She is 30 now and still complains of both breaks aching in inclement weather.

Second question, I have seen some truly gorgeous doctors, the one that stands out first in my mind was my mother's heart doctor, he truly was in the right profession, all a woman had to do was look at him and her heart rate would step up to double time, there was never need for a treadmill. The man had one of those side-ways grins that could light up a room and melt your heart.

Oh, I am not a writer but if I could convince one of the Banditas to "take care" of some people for me I will give you a list.

Joan said...

Wow, dianna...that must have been SOME book!

Ahhh...broken wrists. The classic mode of injury is the reflex to "catch yourself" and strike with the wrist flexed.

I had an incident several years ago. I was walking to my car not paying any attention as I scrutinized the cars parked in the handicap spaces (BIG pet peeve of mine as when my Mother had been living "non" handicap people would use of the spaces I needed for her)

Anyway, tripped over a speed bump and went down with both wrists canted out. I was scared spitless that I'd broken them as I have very small wrists.

Nope. Fine. Or so I thought.

Later that night they began to ache. The ache turned into agonizing pain. I did the whole self assessment (as any good nurse will do :-), ROM, nerve and circulation checks.

Ended up I'd bruised them causing swelling which was giving me acute carpal tunnel. Steroid dose pack, ice and splint did wonders.

PJ said...

Congrats Flchen!

I've had a hairline fracture in one leg and cracked ribs but that's it for broken bones. None of those injuries foretell the weather but my arthritic knees sure do and with amazing accuracy!

When I was in my 20's I went to a GYN who was certified Greek God material. He was about 6'5, black hair, dark eyes, gorgeous build and a smile that would stop traffic not to mention a wonderfully caring bedside manner. He had a very successful practice! (grin)

PJ said...

Louisa, your Dr. Jim and Dr. Eric sound like very special guys. Do you happen to know where Dr. Jim went to school or where he grew up? He sounds very much like a guy I went to college with who was in the Vet Med program.

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Joan said...
Wow, dianna...that must have been SOME book!

It was, I promise, we were in battle over a science fiction fantasy, it was mine, I let him look at it and said he could read it when I was finished, he tried to keep it. Nuff said....

Joan said... (BIG pet peeve of mine as when my Mother had been living "non" handicap people would use of the spaces I needed for her)
Me too Joan, when my mother was living it was difficult getting her and the wheelchair anywhere, aside from the fact I was exhausted after wrestling the wheel chair out of the car I was always nervous of someone bumping her if I had to push her very far. After moving heaven and earth (or so it seemed) to get the parking pass I could never find a handi-capped space available when we needed it.

Ended up I'd bruised them causing swelling which was giving me acute carpal tunnel. Steroid dose pack, ice and splint did wonders.
So does the injury still ache in bad weather?? When my daughter broke her wrist it was the two very small bones. It sounds like Rice Crispies when she moves it even now if the weather is damp.

Joan said...

Nope, dianna...the wrists do not hurt. The damage was all soft tissue as opposed to the bones or the cartilage lining the joint.

Now my knees...a whole nother story.

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Joan, what did you do to your knees?? My BF was a coal miner for approx ten years and his knees will never be the same. He is younger than I am but he can barely move sometimes because of the damage.

Joan said...

Ahh injury just running around on concrete based floors for years taking care of patients.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hi Helen! Ouch for your poor daughter. As you said, she made up for all the others, didn't she? *wince*

What is it that all the docs on TV are smexy and the real ones just...aren't?

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hmmm, Jo, only you could get a cool, fun, and smexy cardiologist. I wouldn't mind that either....Grins.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hmmmm, Dr. Hatch, I see we had some encouraging to do...Grins. I think you'd make a fab doctor.

I'm glad to know at least TWO of you now have said you know of some real life cutie-docs.

BTW, Natalie, any man with an accent's dangerous, but a doctor? Oh, yeah, VERRRRRRRY dangerous. :>

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Bwah-ha-ha, Anna S, we're there for you on the subtle, appropriate revenge. Always glad to help a lady out, you know? :>

Kudos to you for scoring a hot doc too. Wow, it must just be DC. Urg. Had to laugh aout you comparing notes w/ your pals about who got to go to an appointment.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

And hey, that's too possible docs in the house, Anna S and Natalie! Wow! Such brains!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Joan, I KNEW you'd have something like that fractured "member" to tell about. *shakes head." Nurses ALWAYS have the best stories. Really.

Sigh on the Irish docs. :> Black hair. Blue eyes. Gets me EVERY time. :>

The weatherwise thing I got when I broke a bone in my hand and in my nose. I hope the litlle guy won'd be subject to it since it's not a joint area. :>

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hey Louisa! So you too have gotten to work with some McDreamy docs. It's a conspiracy, I tell ya' 'cause there's nigh onto NONE in DC.

So vet tech-ing huh? I've done that too and yep, it's about not gettin' bit and making sure the potential bitee gets helped in spite of himself/herself.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Lousia, glad to know I'm not the only one who engages in a little Writer's Revenge!

JT, you've had biters?

Joan said...

JT, you've had biters?

Oh, yeah. Some who've tried.

When older folks get confused they often gain the strength of Hercules and the temperment of a wildcat.

One lady...and I'm pretty sure this was her baseline...had nails about 1 1/2 inches long. She got hold of my hand and drove those nails into my palm with the grip of a rabid wolverine.

I barely got away with my skin intact.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hey Dianna, I'm always up for a little payback on characters. I'm happy to give them any name you want. Grins.

Owie on the owie for your son. Its so hard when they can't communicate, no matter what their age. Q had me in near terror because he said his neck hurt. All I could I think of was a broken neck, but no, thankfully his collarbone is PART of his neck according to Q. And it is, he's right, but oh...the panic....

Dianna, I broke my hand doing Tae Kwon Do. We were doing set patterns and there's what a little inattention will get you... a broken hand. Ouch.

Have to say though that I am SO LOL about fighting in "your" house about the book. I can just see a defiant you saing, okay I won't fight him here, can I fight him THERE?

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

PJ, lucky you on having that GYN. I don't have the luck! And wouldn't it be a "small world" thing if you'd gone to school with Louisa's Dr. Jim??

PJ said...

Jeanne, I just got home from five days in DC. I didn't see any dreamy docs but I encountered a lot of friendly, helpful Washingtonians! :)

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

JT and Dianna, I'm wincing over the Handicap parking passes AND the knees. I didn't have it with my Mom as ya'll did, but my brother had a stroke a few years ago. I helped him out for a couple of weeks early on in his (thankfully spectacular) recovery. It's always torqued me that people park there w/o the pass, but never more so than when I was trying to manage an unfamiliar wheelchair, keep him stable on his "good" side until I could get him in the chair and not hurt his knee which was really screwed up from ACL surgery. We were seriously a comedy routine with all our balancing and wavering. A handicap spot sure would have helped...

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Joanie, the vivid image of that old lady is now burned on my retinas. OUCH! and btw EWWWW on the nails!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

PJ, it's a really friendly city, isn't it? For the most part, everyone is helpful and they have these yellow-jacketed sidewalk patrollers, The City Crew, who are there for directions and they do clean up and watch out for the tourists. They're great.

Did you get to do any museums?

PJ said...

Jeanne, our whole purpose in going was to do the "tourist thing". We went to the Washington Monument (to the top), Vietnam Wall, Korean, FDR, Lincoln, Jefferson and WWII Memorials, Arlington Cemetery, Air and Space Museum, Museum of Natural History, National Archives, National Art Gallery, National Portrait Gallery, Bureau of Engraving and had Congressional tours of the Capitol, Library of Congress and White House. We all had a wonderful time but, yes, we came home totally exhausted.

Btw, I only took 989 photos! :)

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...
Hey Dianna, I'm always up for a little payback on characters. I'm happy to give them any name you want. Grins.

I will send you a list with name and characteristics...LOL

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Oh, PJ, how COOL! But only 989 photos? How did you restrain yourself? Grins.

It's such a fun place. Riding the metro, doing the museums, all that. But it is exhausting. If you saw the White House you were two blocks from my DH's office.

What did you think of the WWII memorial? That's the only one I've not seen yet. With the kids, I don't get to get down to DC as much as I used to.

You'll have to do the Spy Museum and the Indian Museum and the UdvarHazy Air and Space out near Dulles Airport when you come back. :> The UdvarHazy building is absolutely enormous. It has full sized planes on display. The Space Shuttle, the SST, the Enola Gay - so much it's almost overwhelming. My older son's class just went there for a field trip. Really amazing.

The spy museum is just flat out COOOOL. Also the Museum of medicine out here in the suburbs at the NIH. There's also the building musuem for those of us who are crazy about architecture. :> Ooh, and the National Geographic center...

You could spend weeks here and not see everything. :>

Joan said...

Joanie, the vivid image of that old lady is now burned on my retinas

Yeah, well that's the first time I'd truly seen a "feral gleam" in someone's eyes.

I held her gaze with my "flashing fire" eyes and said "Let. Go. NOW!"

She did but I swear I heard demonic laughter.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Dianna, I'm at your service...VEG...bwah-ha-ha!!!

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said... Q had me in near terror because he said his neck hurt. All I could I think of was a broken neck, but no, thankfully his collarbone is PART of his neck according to Q. And it is, he's right, but oh...the panic....
I think I would have just had a heart attack and been done with it. I am fairly decent in such situations but I go to pieces after the fact. How is he doing now?

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said... I broke my hand doing Tae Kwon Do. We were doing set patterns and there's what a little inattention will get you... a broken hand. Ouch.
And I bet it aches like a tooth ache now when the weather is nasty doesn't it?
I was paying attention I was just too slow to block, could have been worse, I partly deflected it, I would hate to think what would have happened otherwise. He was supposed to be pulling back and didn't.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

I've decided the flashing fire eyes are the seperate domain of red headed nurses - my sister has that "look of death" thing and uses it to great effectiveness. :>

*shudder* on the demonic laughter. I can just see that scene. And those nails...ewwwww.

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said... Have to say though that I am SO LOL about fighting in "your" house about the book. I can just see a defiant you saying, okay I won't fight him here, can I fight him THERE?
I paid for that little bit of lip, dad didn't take kindly to being embarrassed AND sassed, I hadn't gotten my mad under control yet and it slipped out. I got my book back though!! And William got a whoopin' for fighting with a girl, considering the girl was the one that taught him to fight in the first place it wasn't really fair of my uncle but it soothed my wounded "pride" a little bit anyway.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Thanks for asking Dianna, Q is doing really well. I thought about having a heart attack on the spot - seriously considered it - but figured my DH would not appreciate having to go to the ER alone. Sigh.

I was totally worthless for the rest of the day because of it, in reaction. Same thing the day I took him to the ortho. I have to say its so much worse when the little guys are hurt. You want to take their pain for them.

As to the hand, I did it about 12 years ago and the aching has subsided. However it still does the "weather" thing when there's something big brewing. When the remains of the hurricane came through, yeeeeeouch. That was an Advil moment. The irony is, I broke it on a 12-year-old's kneecap. I didn't realize it was broken and went to a charity event the next day. I'd been favoring it, but when this big brawny guy stuck his hand out, I automatically put my hand to shake.

Ooooooooooch. I thought I was going to throw up on his shoes. So, I went to the doctor and found out it was broken fer shure. Sigh.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Dianna, do you remember what the book was? I remember fighting my brothers for certain books. I still have my favoites from childhood.

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...
Dianna, do you remember what the book was? I remember fighting my brothers for certain books. I still have my favoites from childhood.

I can tell you for sure it wasn't a romance...LOL I am not sure of the title and author but the story was about a man and an alien, the alien was pregnant (males had the babies in his culture) and the man had to help deliver it, they were enemies and the word Enemy is in the title but right now I can't recall it.
We also got into it once over a book about an entire submarine and a crew of physicians that were shrunk down small enough to be injected into a patient's bloodstream. The Incredible Voyage I think was the name of that one.

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Ackk, no, THAT one was Fantastic Voyage. Isaac Asimov

Nancy said...

Fedora, congratulations on nabbing the rooster. Have fun with him.

Jeanne, the orthopedic surgeon who assisted on my back operation looked very much like Christopher Reeve. Years later, I consulted with him over whether I could safely take karate, and he still looked very much like Christopher Reeve.

I'm also into Writers Revenge. I have that mug (from DARA, I think--Suz?) that says "Warning: What you do may end up in my next book" or some such. I love it.

PJ, your trip to DC sounds great. I'm hoping to hit a lot of those spots when RWA is in DC next year.

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Enemy Mine, by David Gerrold and Barry B Longyear
Gee, I am not doing as bad as I thought it was, that was many, many years ago.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hi Nancy! *waving madly at the Maggie Winner*

So glad to see you. :> I'm so jealous that your ortho looked like Christopher Reeve. Q's ortho looked like Ghandi with hair and glasses. :>

Bwah-ha-ha on being another Writer's REvenge gal...

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

OMGosh, Dianna, that's great. I've never read that one. :> I've read Fantastic Voyage though and seen the movie too.

hrdwrkdmom aka Dianna said...

Jeanne, I just talked to my cousin and he said no, no, no, that wasn't it....... so I don't know what we fought over other than it was sci fi......LOL He also wanted to know if I was telling someone I whooped him. LOL

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Haha, on your cousin not wanting any one to know all these years later. Then again, my brother doesn't like me to talk about the time I whacked him in the nose and bloodied it. :> And that too has been a LONNNNNNGGG time ago! Ha!

PJ said...

Jeanne, thanks for the list of other places to see. I'll add them to my list for the next visit. We had planned to go to the Spy Museum but ran out of time. We did a lot of walking but also rode the Metro a lot. Our hotel was one block from the L'Enfant Station which made it very convenient to use.

The WWII and Korean memorials were my favorites. Both are impressive in the daylight but even more so at night.

Joan said...


Did you see the monument to military nurses? I've seen photos of it. I believe it is close to the Vietnam Memorial.

I plan to do a LOT of sightseeing next year!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

I've seen the Korea both in the day and at night. It's haunting either way. If you've not seen it, there are five or six bronze, life sized soldiers. They all look back over their shoulders as if there is someone chasing them or coming up behind.

It makes you turn and look as well, expecting to see someone there. I find it very moving and yet disturbing at the same time.

The monument to the nurses is wonderful too, JT.

PJ said...

Joan, it's a very poignant monument. I took pictures of it.

PJ said...

Jeanne, haunting is a very good way to describe the Korea memorial. I was so moved by that memorial and especially all the faces carved into the wall that you can see at night.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

I really love the symbolism and the form of it. There are some pictures at these two websites:

Its really cool.

Suzanne Welsh said...

good morning y'all!

Just crawling out of bed...after a night in the find, Doctors on the blog! hehehe Had to check to be sure I wasn't having a nightmare!! hehehe

Have I ever seen a Dr. McDreamy....

Ohhh honey!

There was an orthopedic resident named Dr. Quinn...(not the medicine woman!) The man had biceps that begged for you to feel and squeeze them. mmmmmmmm And such a nice bedside manner.

Then there was Dr. Spawn. (Yes, an OB named Spawn!) The man was GQ model worthy, and smart, AND had a great bedside manner. (also had a wife just as nice and beautiful, dang it!) The only problem I ever had with him was, he was very difficult to wake up when he was on call and we needed him. Took three phone calls and what my husband and son call the "wake-up-now!" voice.

Suzanne Welsh said...

Nursing school...three years of it's own particular kind of hell. I had nuns for some of my teachers! Hours making care plans for my patients.

Care plans were particularly tortourous devices formulated to make the most stable student nurse pull her hair out. Each care plan had to have a goal for the pt's disease process or processes AND every other body sytem including pshychosocial and sexual!!! And teaching goals for how to teach them about these goals. (Can we all understand why Suz hates the word goal?!?!)

BUT, I learned a few things along the way. How to drink an entire fifth of vodka on a weekend. How to start IV's really well. How to have compassion for dying patients, patience with irrate family members, and a good sense of humor can serve you in the most dire of times. How to make hosptial corners on beds, the fastest way to remove blood from white clothing, and how to dodge the hands of little old men who see you in your little nursing student uniform without breaking their fingers.

Suzanne Welsh said...

OMG Joanie, I've had a few biters in my time too! Usually in the throes of transition and usually on some kind of illicit drug. One time a lady tried to pull my hand to her mouth to bite down. I told her, "You bite me, I'll bite back." Stopped her cold. The resident laughed later and said that was some bluff. I looked at him over my glasses in my most serious face and said, "who was bluffing?" He walked clear of me for weeks, hehehe.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Oh Suz! I'm so sorry to have you wondering if you'd even woken up. :>

I had to just LOL about Dr. Quinn since the subject of the blog, my youngest is named Quinn - Quinnton actually - I wonder if doctoring is in his future. He's got that "engineer gene" thing going and wants to figure everything out. He was fascinated with the Ortho's models of skeletons (he IS my child...) and the articulated knees. He also figured out how to spin the seat up and back, turn on the lightbox and generally wear me out! :> This from a kid hurting form a broked clavicle. :>

And I nearly spewed Diet Coke over Dr. Spawn. SNORK!!! Then again, I went to marriage counselor with the cranky ex-hubby. The counselor looked like John Denver. His name was Dr. Skip Miracle.

I could SO NEVER take him seriously.

Sarah Parr said...

As the result of a nasty car accident involving a tree and black ice, I broke my knee cap. While skiing I tore my wrist. During an unfortunate incident where my horse mistook a chipmunk for a tyrannosaurus rex, I broke my collarbone. There are aches when the weather changes, and in Upstate NY it changes often. Green tea and a square of dark chocolate seem to help. :).

Anna Campbell said...

Hey, Fedora, who needs a doc when you got a chook?

Hey, Jeanne, great post! But sorry to hear you and yours had to go through all that pain to get the inspiration!

I've had a couple of dreamy doctors but honestly, the romance wears off once they start to fumble around in unmentionable places! But I agree, Jeanne, they're a breed I admire.

I've definitely indulged in writer's revenge. In my first draft, all the baddies have names of people who dun me rong. I change them in the final version but it's tremendously satisfying in the meantime!

Helen, I've broken a toe too. My little pinkie. Ouch, ouch, ouch. And it seems to be the one I keep knocking on things. You wouldn't think something as insignificant as a little toe could cause that amount of shooting agony! I've also broken an arm, a finger and a foot. Um, did I ever admit to being a klutz? Actually torn ligaments are more painful than a broken bone - I speak from experience!

Anna Campbell said...

Hey, PJ, welcome back! I'm really looking forward to my trip to Washington next year!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hi Sarah! Welcome to the Lair! :> I was LOL about the tyrannosaurus rex. Snork. I've found that a square of dark chocolate can mitigate almost anything. Ha!

Everyone, Sarah's a fellow Kensington author, she's got a cool new historical coming out next June.

Ouch on the collarbone, though. As you saw from the blog I'm experiencing the pain of that vicariously. NOT fun...

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

La Campbell said: the romance wears off once they start to fumble around in unmentionable places!

Yeah, that would take the shine off even a doc as cute as McDreamy.

I've broken a toe too. SO painful for so long. Sigh. And I was in an auto accident and tore the ligaments that attach the ribs to the sternum. Wow, that's painful, so yep, I agree about that Anna.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

LaCampbell, we'll show you a fab time here in the Nation's Capitol. :> Its a fun town.

Christine Wells said...

Jeanne, you always keep me snorking through your blogs. Love it! I'm very sorry to hear your lovely boy was treated so cavalierly, though. On balance, I think medicos are wonderful people. Like you, I'd run a mile before I'd want to listen to problems all day, not to mention the bodily functions! A wonderful man called Dr. Merry saved my life when I was two and I've had kind of a soft spot for the breed ever since:) My husband's brother, sister-in-law and father are all doctors and I'm sort of partial to them, too.

As for writers' revenge--my characters appear on the page without my permission, so I don't consciously base them on anyone in particular but they often exhibit traits of people I know! Nothing recognizable (or actionable) of course:)

Fedora, I can't believe it! I go away and come back and the rooster still lives with you!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hi Christine! Welcome home to the Lair! :>

You said: As for writers' revenge--my characters appear on the page without my permission

I had to LOL about this. Most of mine appear that way too, but every now and then I get to add a character and can randomly and wantonly do away with. VERY good therapy.

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

That should have been "do away with THEM."


PJ said...

Hi Fo! It's nice to be back though DC was great fun. You're going to enjoy it!

Welcome back, Christine! Hope you had a fun and relaxing trip.

Joan said...

During an unfortunate incident where my horse mistook a chipmunk for a tyrannosaurus rex, I broke my collarbone

ROFL....I have this vision of the chipmunk rearing up on its hind legs going "ROAR"...or maybe "roar" LOL

Glad your ok and hey...congrats on your release! I LOVE historicals!!

As to um, unfortunate names for physicians. There was a proctologist (which I don't think even IS a specialty anymore) when I started as a nurse named....wait for it.... BM Hinney.

You'd hear the whole hospital burst out in laughter whenever he was overhead paged.


Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

"Paging Dr. Hinney! Paging Dr. Hinney!" Snork. So funny Joanie.

Of course Suz's OB Dr Spawn would be funny too:

"Paging Dr. Spawn, Paging Dr. Spawn, please come to the birthing suite..."


Joan said...

"Your Spawn has been delivered."


Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Snork. Better than "Your litter has been whelped..."

I always think that when I read about the septuplets and quints and stuff. That's a litter, you know? No offense to any woman brave enough to bear more than one at a time, but whoa!

Louisa Cornell said...

Note to self : "Do NOT read this blog while drinking a glass of iced tea!" You ladies are a hoot!! Welcome back to all of the AWOL Banditas and Buddies.

PJ, I think Dr. Jim and Dr. Eric both went to vet school at Auburn. The funny thing was that they grew up together, were buddies from kindergarten all the way through vet school.

Biting human patients! Now THAT would scare me! Worst biters? Chihuauhuas. biggest sissies? Rottweilers. Toughest hide and meanest patients? Pot-bellied pigs! Lets just say Dr. Jim's rodeo experience came in handy on that one!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hi again Louisa! :> I agree with you about the Chihuahua's and the Rotties. The worse biter I ever saw was a Chow-chow though. And in the show ring they still have a hard time getting judges for Chows. :> Sweetest dogs I ever saw were Am Staffs - American Staffordshire Terriers. Everyone thinks they're Pit Bulls, but they are so nice. Of course I've met a LOT of really sweet pit bulls too. :>

ArkieRN said...

No broken bones for me. And I'm glad - based on how the patients act it can cause adults to revert to toddlerhood. Oddly, though, children usually are braver about injuries than most adults.

I don't want to think about nursing school. I've spent 12 years and enormous amounts of alcohol to forget it.

I have run across some very hot doctors. Sadly, they are usually married or attached.

Joan said...

Oh, yeah louisa...human bites are NASTY!

We get a lot INTERESTING people in through the hand service who have had um..DISCUSSIONS with other people that ended with one person's teeth in another's finger.

We did have a woman come in with both hands swollen three times their size...looked like a tick about to bust. She claimed BEES had stung her.

Then we noticed track marks on her arms (that matched the ones between her fingers) and asked her what those were. SPIDER bites she assured us.

I looked at the doc and said "Clearly, you need to write her a prescription for Terminex"

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hi ArkieRN! I just figured out from your comments what that RN on your handle stands for! :> My Sis is an RN too and I think she'd probably agree w/ the "..years and large amounts of alcohol to forget" part. Ha!

Have to agree too that most adults have a low pain threshold and are worse than kids. The hardest thing with my little guy is his sheer bewilderment that his shoulder doesn't work like its supposed to. That and he's forgidden from jumping on the bed or playing WWE Smackdown with his brother for 4 weeks! ha!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

OMGosh, JT, spider bites? Terminex? SNORK!!!

Christine Wells said...

Hi Jeanne, a really nasty character meets his death in my next novel--a warning to all cheating husbands, I say!

Thanks for the welcome back, PJ. I had a fantastic holiday. My brain relaxed, even if my body didn't! Must be the only holiday I've ever taken where I lost weight:)

limecello said...

I've broken a bone before - two, but they were just in my feet, so there was nothing to be done. Actually... this leads me to believe I have a high pain threshold, because both times I walked on the broken bone for 4-6 weeks before I finally couldn't stand it and saw a doctor. :X [I have AWFUL luck with doctors so... I avoid them.]
I have tons of relatives/friends who are doctors and in med school - some are/will be amazing, and some are scary. :P I've never seen someone as hot as a tv doctor though, I don't think :P

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Yeah, Christine! Another Writers Revenge-r. I love it when the adulterers get their comeuppance!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hey LimeCello! Ouch on the broken bones in your foot and ouchier on walking on them.

Funny about you saying some of the friends and relatives who are/will be doctors would be great and some scary. I'm also gald to know that at least ONE other person hasn't seen a doc that's as pretty as the ones on TV.

Joan said...


I walked around DISNEYWORLD with the worse pain in my left heel. Two weeks after returning I went to my buddy ortho Dr. P. who told me I had a stress fracture.

I promptly pointed it out to my manager that his was PROOF that the workload was too high...the stress was breaking my bones!!!!

They wouldn't let me count it as workman's comp though....not when they could blame Mickey!

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

JT, I can just see you, hands on hips, "Don't you blame that poor mouse, its the workload HERE that's the problem!"


Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

'Night everyone! Thanks for playing today!!!