by Christine WellsDo you find yourself getting irritated for very little cause these days?
When I worked in a legal firm, I would often put in twelve hour days and work on the weekends, too. Life was fast-paced and stressful. And I found myself getting irritated at the least little thing in the world outside that went against me. I had so many pet peeves, I could have filled a zoo.
I've left that life now, but I still feel the stress of deadlines and balancing writing and family life. We're about to start a house renovation and won't that do a lot to improve my blood pressure?
Here are just some of my pet(ty) peeves:
*People who leave the toilet seat up, which is closely tied to people who refuse to replace an empty toilet paper roll
*People who assume that because I am at home with children my time is less valuable than theirs
*Litter in public places--how hard is it to find a bin/trash can?
*People who spend the entire train ride talking loudly on their cell phone
*Rudeness from people in the "hospitality" industry.
*Sultanas. I wish sultanas had never been invented. Nasty, squishy little surprises that creep in to all sorts of food that would otherwise be delicious... Uh, sorry. See what I mean? The more stressed we get the more petty our peeves become.
But I realized one day that I need to let go of these small irritations to become a more effective writer. When your head is preoccupied with little things, it's very hard to get the creative brain working to its full capacity.How do you let go of stress? I've found some things that work--exercise, especially yoga, hypnosis, meditation. I imagine a session with the boxing gloves would help(though the only time I tried it I couldn't lift my arms without pain for a week!)
Sometimes, all it takes is reminding myself that this time next week I'll have forgotten all about this particular incident. Have a little tolerance, for goodness' sake!
OK, so tell me your day to day pet peeves... and now tell me how you decompress. I'd love to add some strategies to my list!
61 comments:
Christine, I sympathize with your pet peeves. I also deal with people who think my time should be available when they want it to be. Very irritating.
I don't like it when people walk between me and bookshelf I'm looking at in the store (have to stand back, after all, to see the lower shelves) and do not say "excuse me." Same goes for people who are happy to let you hold a door for them but cannot be bothered to say "thank you."
Hey--door holding is not an entitlement for any part of the population.
Or people who just barrel toward you and expect you to move instead of walking up to you and saying, "excuse me, can I squeeze by?" (Saying this in an aggrieved tone forfeits all potential politeness points.)
And seriously, the people who, when a highway lane is closed and people are merging, barrel up to the choke point and try to bull their way in.
I have many traffic-related issues, so I'll just stop with that one.
As for decompressing, I used to go to the gym. It was very effective. I know that, like you, I will be unable to use my arms effectively for several days once I go back to it. I didn't know flesh could rust, but it feels as though it did. The trick is to push through the rust. I just need to go do it.
Hey, it's me? I get the bird?
Hmmm. Since Herself died, I have no one to exercise constant vigilance. The boy and the dh have other priorities.
I know--I'll shut him up in the bathroom with Comet and a scrub brush. He can't come out until the shower is clean. Then he can do the tub. And if he behaves--IF--I'll let him take a nap. In here, where I can keep an eye on him while I revise.
Hey, Nancy, one chook for you! He should be nice and calm and dosed up on Tim Tams!
Christine, your email gave me a giggle. We spend quite a lot of our time whingeing about our pet peeves. I must say pet peeves have the virtue of giving me something to talk to my girlfriends about!
Hmm, a selection would include people who keep me waiting consistently (everybody's late now and again for unavoidable reasons but I know people for whom tardiness is a vocation). Is my time any less valuable than theirs? I don't think so!
People who try to get me to sign up to making a fortune on my computer at home and tell me so on my facebook page!
People who automatically get superior at the word 'romance'. When they have very little right to any feelings of superiority that I can see.
Zen moments? Looking at water. Looking at wildlife. Saying to myself "This too shall pass."
Nancy, I love the idea of 'pushing through the rust!' The description of flesh rusting is so evocative. Honestly, I can tell you're a writer. Yes, I think you're right. Exercise can make you feel so good you can easily brush aside petty irritations. I ought to do it more often.
Yes, I have a number of traffic-related peeves, too! I never used to be so irritated by other drivers. Is road rage catching? I think I got it from my dh.
Oh, and totally with you on the barrel toward you thing. There are times, when walking in town, where I look down at myself to make sure that no, I hadn't turned invisible since last I looked! I always take care not to dawdle and to walk on the correct side of the path. There's no need for people to mow me down!
Yay, you got the bird!
Snork! I think the bird is going to have his feathers seriously ruffled after a day with you, Bad Bandita! Go, Nancy!
Anna, I think you hit the nail on the head--all that whingeing actually does allow us to relieve some of that tension! As long as we don't go on about it too much and become each other's sources of irritation!
Isn't it the case that the people who always keep you waiting are the least apologetic about it? They laugh and say, ah but you know I can never be on time. The answer in my head is "Try."
Totally agree about the facebook page. I think it's quite rude of people to put sales advertising on other people's walls, don't you? Hmm, maybe we should write a book of fb etiquette!
Ah, yes, nature can do wonders to remind you that the world is so much bigger than your own petty troubles, can't it? And for really stressful moments, I think ahead to how I'll feel when it's over. "This too shall pass" really works if you can stop to think about it!
I need to make a list and run through all these possibilities when life gets too complicated!
pet peeve -- the older I get, the more I find I'm turning into my mother (things, or simular things, she bitched about, I'm finding myself bitching about ;-/ )
office pet peeve (& partly what helped me realise the above) -- bad kitchen etiquette. Using the last of utensil, paper towel, etc and not replacing -- the supply closet is just a few feet away people! Finishing or all but finishing the coffee but leaving the pot on the hot burner to burn (burning coffee pot not a good smell). Even when a in big letters and bright colors is hanging right over the coffee machine where it can't be missed asking them to either make more or turn the burner off when emptying the pot because empty pot on hot burner is a fire hazard & they still do (honest I am not kidding, it was done just yesterday!) UGH! Annoying!
Just thinking about it -- Grrrr. Must go destress, relax. Breath. Book. Puppy cuddles. Ahh, yes those will work. Feeling better just thinking about it :)
Gamistress -- I feel your pain! A little courtesy and consideration is all it takes to create a happy environment at the work kitchen, isn't it? We used to have people stealing other people's lunches in my office. Seriously!
Puppy cuddles. Will add that to the list. Nothing will cheer you up like the uncritical appreciation of a dog!
Helen, congrats on the GR.
Pet peeves ... I have one very big pet peeve and it's rather a silly one. I HATE, HATE, HATE grubby fingerprints on my computer screen. When people at work come to my desk and starting using their fingers to poke at my computer screen I usually smack them (hard-ish - I want to make sure I get my point across) and then hand them a pen with a "use this" and explanation about the grubby fingerprints peeve. They usually remember after a few times of getting smacked. I also always have a spray jar of Windex or Mr Muscle next to my desk to clean up those fingerprints. :-)
Oops, sorry, Nancy ... eyes saw "Nancy", brain read "Helen" and fingers typed what brain thought. Sorry, sorry. NANCY!!!!
Congrats on the GR, Nancy.
Hi Christine,
One of my pet peeves is people who stand in front of the subway doors so that you can't get off or on the train. Even in a crowded train car you can make an effort to step aside. Sometimes a nice little snack helps me to decompress. Watching comedies also helps.
Ooh, Daz! I'm not surprised people remember after a few good smacks. Good on you! I actually hate other people fiddling about on my computer, especially my dh who tends to do drastic things.
Soo.. does Windexing your screen help you decompress?
Jane, I agree about the subway and another is when people waiting to get on block the path of people trying to get off. It just slows things down as well as being impolite!
So agree.. when the going gets tough, the tough get chocolate! And laughing is a proven remedy for stress, isn't it? Great ideas!
Well done Nancy and yes he did have his fair share of Tim Tams yesterday so he may be hyped up.
Christine
My biggest pet peeve is the same as Anna's people who are always late that really gets to me but I just keep smiling and get on with what ever I have to do and all the things you listed as well except the sultanas LOL I rather enjoy them.
Manners are another thing as Nancy has already said there is no excuse for not saying please and thank you and excuse me and I always say them for someone who doesn't even to adults and I do get weird looks sometimes LOL.
AS I work in the hospitality industry I agree big time with that one we are there to serve you the customer and should do so with a smile and great manners and I too expect it my motto treat others the way you would like to be treated.
As for getting over these peeves not sure that I can change people that way I try to do the right thing and take a deep breathe and get on with doing things as good as I can.
Have Fun
Helen
Hey Christine!
I used to commute an hour each way to work and it's a given that some folks are emboldened when they're behind the wheel. One day, a man intentionally bumped me twice with his front bumper in an attempt to get me to turn against a red light. Not one of my prouder moments, but I got out of my car and dumped my latte all over his windshield and dared him to get out of his car. He locked the door instead. Having said that, I'm normally never that ill-mannered. Honest. I can't stand people who think they're entitled. I don't know where this comes from...when did bad manners go out of style? With the advent of the internet and people posting under a pseudonymn, rude and nasty behavior is at its peak. I was on a book review site earlier and the reviewer bashed the book. The author chimed in..I thought she handled it well, but the reviewer and her followers jumped all over her. Unbelievable.
Zen moments...I'll either read or play some oldies music that takes me back in time. Anything to keep me from raiding the fridge. :)
Congrats on the GR, Nancy!
Wow, Jen, you're one tough cookie (can I have that cookie with a latte? LOL!). Love the latte story! I'm never brave enough to do stuff like that but I so wish I was!
OMG LOL - Jen wins with her latte! I'm loving this image so much.
Pet peeves... how long do we have?
Okay, I'll keep it short *g*
Rudeness. WTF? How hard is it to use manners? They don't cost a thing, are readily available and usually net better results that obnoxious behavior.
Not replacing the toilet paper. Drives me batty. Not one person in this house besides me thinks its necessary that their tp come off a holder.
People who narrate during a movie. If I wanted to hear someone's opinion of the flick, I'd read a review.
People who ride their bikes like they own the road, without following the laws. Dude cut me off the other day and I swear, if I hit him and he dented my Mini, I was going to back up and run him over a couple more times, I was so mad.
Hmm... I think I'm getting a little too worked up here.
Zen. I have a gorgeous fluorite sphere I meditate with when I'm stressed. Or I run on the treadmill. Or I cuss. Cussing tends to make me really happy. I'll admit, I cuss more than I run on the treadmill :-(
I drove a beat up old Saab, and I felt he figured it was okay to bump me. The sign read no turn on red. I never do stuff like that, but I was so mad. I was jumping up and down and screaming.."Get your Wonder Bread white bread (patootie) out of the car!" Like I said, I'm usually very calm and well-mannered.
I was jumping up and down and screaming.."Get your Wonder Bread white bread (patootie) out of the car!"
ROFLMAO!!!!
See, now that's Zen.
Hi Helen! LOL on the bird being hyped on Tim Tams. I bet he had a better time at your place than he will at Nancy's!
Yes, no excuse for bad manners, I agree. The world would certainly be a better place if everyone 'did unto others'.
Deep breaths! That's always a good on-the-spot solution :)
OMG, Jen, you are SO brave! I would never have the guts to do something like that. I love that you took decisive action. LOL on your Wonderbread insult, that's just priceless.
Oldies music sounds like a good idea. Thanks!
Tawny wrote: I'll admit, I cuss more than I run on the treadmill
Snork! So do I. I find cussing is a great tension-reliever, and like taking a deep breath, you can do it on the spot. Of course, not if your little ones are around...*G* The meditation sounds great, too.
Whoa, Nancy, WTG on getting the chook.
Great topic, Christine. I find as I get older my pet peeve list gets shorter. I pare it down to the basics. Get that toilet seat down thing fixed right now before the boys get bigger than you LOL.
Anna, I get your irritation with people who consistently keep you waiting and right up there, IMO, are people for whom you rush to be on time and they're late! With no apology.
Pink/Jennifer, that's a great story! OTOH, my son accidentally cut someone off in early morning traffic a number of years ago, and the guy brandished a gun at him!!
True story, hand to God.
What I do to decompress is exercise. Trite, but tried and true. Sometimes when I'm grumpy, Dr. Big says, "Why don't you jump on the treadmill for a while?"
Excellent and timely post, Christine! I've completely lost my mind lately about how certain people in my house think getting their clothes *near* the laundry basket is the same as getting them *in* the laundry basket.
It's not.
I also think it's interesting how nobody in my house seems concerned with putting the trash & recycling out. Or mowing the lawn. Apparently the lawn is invisible to everybody else in my house, or of such trivial importance that it's unworthy of their time.
My time, however, is cheap.
Probably because I don't do anything all day. Nothing important, anyway. Just raising our kids. Doing our laundry. Mowing our lawn. Cooking our food. Doing our shopping. Filling out school forms & keeping track of piano lessons. Oh, & I write books, too, but that's nothing. I hardly get paid.
[pant, pant]
Okay, it's not *that* bad but I'm still peeved.
As I said, timely post. Very timely post. :-)
I was hoping someone else would ask, but what's a sultana? Anything squishy sounds icky.
When stressed, sing! Start singing, any kind of song will do. It's amazingly effective.
Reading relaxes me. Every night before falling asleep I read, otherwise thoughts start twirling through my head - including all the things I should have said.
I know I have loads of peeves but must be in some weird relaxed world that few come to mind.
I DO hate people who zoom off the expressway without thought to traffic and EXPECT to be able to merge missing my car by a hair's breath. I do rant and rave inside my car but...with the crazies out there in the world...would never have the nerve to do what you did Peony.
A work related one that comes to mind is when I come into the nurse's station...trying to a)wake up b)ease into my work and am blasted with comments like "Run while you still can!" "It's horrible!" etc. etc.
I HATE this prejuidiced, negative thing hitting me between the eyes right off the bat!!!!
And Claudia, I believe a Sultana is a variation on a prune which...I think with the right amount of butter, sugar and baking hands could be made into something yummy. :-)
My pet peeves are people who sit out in front of your house and blow there horn over and over again.people in line in front of you in a store leave there cart to go back and do more shopping.when people let there small children run wild in a store.
Nancy, congrats on nabbing the GR! Hope he doesn't make a huge mess...
I used to have more pet peeves than I do now, Christine. I think you have to let some go or make yourself crazy. :-) One that still bothers me, though, is when people will ignore a recycling bin and toss their recyclables in the trash.
I have fished many an empty can or bottle from a coworkers trash can and put it in the recycling containers that are ON OUR FLOOR. It's not like they have to truck it up the stairs or anything! Most of them act as if they never saw the HUGE bins in the break room. It's sheer laziness!
Nancy, I totally agree with you about the inconsiderate people who refuse to merge and try to bully their way into traffic at the last second. Especially when you've been waiting a long while and they barrel up the lane at high speed - as if no one else were smart enough to think of it. ACK!
Pink, congrats on confronting the bully. I'm only sorry you had to waste your latte on that jerk!
Well, the rooster claimed the shower was clean. Unfortunately for him, my definition of "clean" was shaped by my parents, whose viewpoints were shaped by the United States Navy.
He's working on it some more. Grumbling, but working.
I did hear him mutter, "Helen never makes me..." and something about Tim Tams, but he had the sense to shut up when I asked him to repeat that.
Ermingarde the dragon, who was bored, offered to rooster-sit, so she's crammed into the doorway, watching him. Since he can't get by her, that should keep him out of trouble.
Anna, I so agree about lateness. My grandfather, who was punctual to the point of always being early, used to say that being late is a sign of disrespect for the other person's time. It happens to everyone now and again, but people who are chronically late really have no excuse.
Nancy, I remember reading in a quote book somewhere something that made me laugh - it went something like it's a rule of life that the people who arrive late are always in a much better mood than the people who have been waiting! ;-)
Can I speak up for the humble sultana? I think they've really nice and add a nice bit of juicy flavor to things like cakes and cereals. We already know Christine has no tastebuds - she doesn't like Cherry Ripes! ;-)
By the way, I looked up a definition:
a. Any of various green seedless grapes, especially the Thompson seedless, used in producing raisins and a white wine.
b. The often yellow raisin made from this grape.
Jo, that is scary about the man brandishing a gun! Road rage is truly frightening, isn't it? If we were all in less of a hurry, we wouldn't care so much, would we. Yes, you're right. Exercise really does cure many ills. I need to do a lot more.
You know another pet peeve of mine? Every single time I sign in to blogger, the first time it always says identification failed and I have to type my password over again. Sheesh! Hmmm, maybe I need to jump on the treadmill..
Wow, Susan, you have put in a nutshell the source of most of my day to day frustration! I signed up for taking care of kids and domestic duties but I didn't agree to be anyone's slave! I find myself saying "who do you think is going to pick that up if you leave it there, the tidy fairy?"
Hey, it's the Incomparable, come to visit! Great to see you here, Claudia!
Sultanas are dried white grapes (I think) as opposed to raisins which are dried red grapes. Hope I have that right. People put them in cereal, cakes, biscuits, apple strudel, bread and butter pudding... Nasty little things pop up when you least expect them! If you don't know what they are, you are blessed:)
Oh, yes, singing is a great one! I often do that in the car when the boys are fighting in the back. Crank up the radio and sing. It beats taking them to the nearest police station.
Catslady, isn't it deadly to think about all the things you should have said? I used to do that when I was at school. Now I'm mainly a hermit, so I don't do it any more. But losing yourself in a book is therapeutic, isn't it? Then you're reading about someone else's troubles!
Joanie, I love that you find it hard to call to mind things that bug you. You must be feeling mellow:) Could that be kitty power?
Oh, negativity at work really does depress you, doesn't it? I used to hate that, too. You should tell them to htfu!
You wrote: And Claudia, I believe a Sultana is a variation on a prune which...I think with the right amount of butter, sugar and baking hands could be made into something yummy. :-)
Wash your mouth out, young lady!! I happen to like prunes, but death to the Sultana, I say!
Hi Peggy, yes can identify with those peeves as well. Closely tied to the horn blowing is the person in my neighbourhood who always sets off their car alarm. Drives me nuts!
Caren, isn't it great to see all the recycling bins around these days? They've only just introduced the practice in public places here, although we've been doing it at home for a long time. Oh, yes, that habit of pushing in at the head of the queue really irritates me, too!
LOL Nancy! I see some singed feathers in that bird's future!
Anna, now *you* have to wash your mouth out twice! One for The Vile Cherry Ripe and one for sultanas. Closely related in overly sweet squishiness, I have to say. I hate that almost every so-called healthy cereal has sultanas in it. My dh laothes them, too, so clearly ours is a match made in heaven!
I hate people who litter too. But sultanas, I'm ok with it. As for de-stressing, I think looking at the sea or sky do that for me.
My Darcy Mutates…
Hi Enid! Another sultana lover. Looks like I'm outnumbered here:)
Oh, yes, staring at the sea is very calming, isn't it? I wish I lived closer so I could do it more often.
Well goodness, a Sultana is just a raisin variation? That's better than prunes!!
Seriously, Mme. let me make some of my equally fantastic Oatmeal Raisin cookies with some and ship them. They'll hold up well as I sent some to Iraq to a soldier :-)
Joanie, I'm sorry but not even your fabulous cooking can make me eat sultanas--which just shows you how much I hate them. Why ruin a perfectly good cookie, I ask you?Thank you for the offer, though! You're a sweetheart.
Christine, Windexing does not help me decompress but it certainly gets rid of the grubby fingerprints.
As to decompressing, I've recently discovered I love aromatherapy and soothing hot stone massages. Bliss!
Hi Daz, just the thought of aromatherapy and hot stone massage makes me feel good! Sounds just the ticket:)
Yay, Nancy! Make that GR swab that deck! Tell him he can't leave the bathroom until he has completely "policed the area." I would give anything to hear my Air Force sergeant Dad say that one more time! "Police your area. Now!"
Christine, what a great post. I just got home from work and good grief that place is pet peeve central!
I despise people who think because I work at Walmart I have an IQ of 70 and deserve to be treated like an indentured servant.
People who wait until the penultimate last minute to order their child's birthday cake and assume that lack of planning on their part constitutes an emergency on their part. It DOESN'T!
There is never, ever an excuse for bad manners. "Please" and "Thank you." are NOT optional in my mind. Nor is "Excuse me." or "I beg your pardon." Nothing sets me off faster than seeing a child or young adult display bad manners in front of their parents and said parents just smile and don't bother to correct them. GRRRR
I do not WANT to know every detail of someone's personal life so I really wish they would save those conversations for a time when they are not wandering around like Moses in the desert with their cell phones glued to their ears in a public place!
People who see me writing on my laptop during a break or my lunch at work and cannot refrain from asking "Are you writing a book about Walmart?" make me see red. They ask the same question over and over and laugh every time. It is no longer funny, if it ever was!
Relaxation and detoxification? Visiting the Romance Bandits, of course. Reading a great romance novel. Singing opera at the top of my lungs. Watching British comedies. Playing frisbee or tug of war with my outside dogs, especially the 'Idiot Brothers' - Clyde and Zorro. They will play until they drop and are the sweetest, most gentle dogs around. They always make me smile. Pillow fight with my little house dogs. Brushing my cat, Bagheera. He loves it and I can really get into the Zen of it. Quilting - the repetitive nature of it and the creativity are always good de stressors.
Pet peeves - Oh, so many, so little time!
Someone mentioned cyclists and I have to agree. We had a huge group riding up in our area today and they took over the road. I had to crawl for miles behind them on curving country roads. Argh! To lighten my mood, I was thinking about how much fun it would be to go bowling. Not that I would, of course, but it brought a smile to my face.
People who walk in front of you when you're looking at a bookshelf at the library. Like it's too far around to go behind me! I'm not that big! Even if it is too far to walk, an excuse me would be good.
People who bash mail boxes! Is that really a sport?
I hate that smirk some people get when I tell them I write romance. They don't say anything that I can rebutt, just stand there mentally rolling their eyes. Maddening!
I was out to lunch with some co-workers and one girl kept texting throughout the whole meal. Is our conversation that boring???
Expensive berries that start molding the day after you buy them.
Getting home and finding out that item on sale showed up on the receipt at regular price.
People who go 50 in the fast lane of a 65 mph highway. Move over people! The left lane is for passing and faster traffic!
Nancy and Caren, to respectfully point out: there are two lanes up to a point for a reason, so that the single lane doesn't extend back to the next state. And merging to me, means taking turns. My pet peeve are those people who have gotten into the single lane way back and don't want anyone driving up the other lane so they crawl bumper to bumper and don't let anyone "merge". :)
To destress I walk along the river or read a book. Or I make up stories in my head about the irksome situation. ;)
Oh, Louisa, you're so right--common courtesy is such an essential ingredient in society. It's a pity it seems to be going out of fashion. I get stared at because I never let my children get away with not saying please or thank you. In fact, if they forget, I make them say the entire request again, not just the please part. At home, I ignore the request until they think about it an rephrase the question with a please in it.
Spending time with animals is very therapeutic, isn't it? I'd love to hear you sing one day. Maybe a performance at RWA one year?
Laurie, cyclists on roads really worry me because some of them do the dumbest things! And then they all complain about how everyone complains about them.
Your comment about the berries resonates with me. I always lift the punnets up to check the ones at the bottom--often they are mush. Criminal to sell them at those prices when they're already half rotten!
See what you mean about merging--you're right. I was imagining a situation which we have one one of my regular routes, where people use the passing lane to queue jump and push in further up when there's a traffic jam. I hate that, and I don't think that's a question of merging, it's a question of not wanting to wait in line like everyone else.
Another water decompressor. I wonder what it is about water that makes us feel calmer? You sound like you'd be writing a few murder mysteries in your head, Laurie:)) Thanks for sharing!
Hey Christine!
I don't know any, beyond the one you mentioned about rudeness from the hospitality industry, that are particular .
Actually it's rudeness from anybody. I just don't like for people to be mean to me. It pisses me off.
It's kind of a day to day thing. Like you, I get irritated much more easily when I am unavoidably delayed, very behind schedule, or extremely stressed.
The ways I decompress from any series of bad events are 1) exercise if I can manage it 2) a little meditation if I can manage it, and 3) sitting by my fire with a glass of wine. These are hard to come by on the road, but if I'm at home, I really do try to do one of these (or ALL of these) and while doing so, 4)remind myself that "this too shall pass" and it's really my choice to give it all this meaning, and I don't have t omake that choice, I can just let it go.
I forge that I can just "let it go" with unfortunate frequency. :0/
Nancy, congrats on the bird!!!
Oh....you're a slavedriver aren't you?!?
OMG....reading through the comments.
Do NOT get me started on interstate drivers....Just don't go there.
Talk about a spike in blood pressure....
Gah!
Hi Cassondra! Looks like we all have pretty similar pet peeves, doesn't it? Although I notice no one is with me on the sultana thing.LOL
I like the sitting by the fire with a glass of wine strategy. We just spent our first winter without a fire. The weather was too mild for it, would you believe? And you're right--with all of these things, we just need to get some perspective, which often means mentally distancing yourself from the situation. Pretty difficult to do that in traffic but it's worth a try. Thanks for commenting!
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